Three Word Story

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9 years 11 months ago #541 by riada
Replied by riada on topic Three Word Story
Today, I went to fuckin work and farted profusely on my coworkers and it smelled like dead gerbils. So the coworkers decided to beat me senseless till I lost control of my bowels. I got up and felt a sharp pain in My groin area. So i screamed, "HOLY FUCKING SHIT!, call the doctor!" The doctor said, "ice your balls". I said, "why?" he said, "because, balls are swollen." I wonder how I got kicked and it hurts.

I'm driving home, balls hanging down to My knees. I pick them up, they have warts. So I'm home taking it easy, drinkin' a beer when suddenly I have no smokes and consider castration.

The next day i lick myself and find LTG kicking my ass and then licking the TV screen. I quickly dressed and headed to the closet brothel to find me a hot hooker with hairy armpits who looked like Joey Lauren Adams. After this, I went to Pathmark to buy protection from this skanky dirty meat hole. But instead I sat on my sweaty swollen balls and played with those little things. I got hungry and ate some wet dog food from the garbage from last week. It was delicious! Then I noticed my nose bleeding from to much Powdered Phororhacos Bill. I grab my big 10 inch black rubber dildo and head to The Town Square where i proceed to touch myself. Meanwhile, the 10" black rubber dildo is still lost and I'm worried it will never be recovered from the thief who stole my toy. I'm so mad! Hopefully someone will choke my chicken or perhaps will demonic do it? You never know. He's that type, that damn homo.

I look outside and its raining so i dance. Then the police stopped by to test out there new and improved cavity search program. Now my sphincter has been widened beyond repair. Now it is prolapsed. I call my pimp and say,"tighten it up!" she giggled with much enthusiasm about seeing me naked and freshly violated, causing sexual tension between us two. It was hard and i couldn't hold my bowels for much longer! My pimp stuck a cork in it, and said,"in your ass is a surprise!" Later that night, after all the canned beans were opened and eaten, I watched TV. Those Ghost Adventurers sure do SUCK! My sphincter clenching, in pain from having butt sex way to much. Should use lubricant instead of glue made for shoes! Now my pubes are glued together and it ITCHES!

The next day I woke up and forgot to remove my underwear from my sticky, smelly private parts. It was hard to peel them off my balls,but i managed to wax myself totally Brazilian style. I then discovered my left nut was mysteriously missing. Now I'm Pissed that I have only one nut. But, life goes on and I'm having an orgasm. It seems like I function fine, cause it splattered purple goo from my third eye.

So for breakfast i went to my local Hooters. The waitress suggested I cover my hairy chest with her hairy chest. What a sight! So I did. Boy did we create a scene! The local newspaper reported that we started a new spicy breakfast sandwich. It was sooo spicy even Demonic rated it X.

After breakfast I went to Walmart to buy worms. I plan on getting real kinky while fishing today. I stop home and grab my new 10" dildo, which is smaller than the fish, but it comes with a violent temper. I prep myself for anything that could possibly go wrong with the violent implement. I'm nervous that I might enjoy it less than I planned on. I drive to Rockland Psychiatric Hospital and the orderlies were chasing around a three legged dog in the cafeteria. I freak and call Misterpat while masturbating to Master Of Puppets. He said not to give chase and I'm babbling. He hangs up. Miffed I pick up an icepick and stab the worms i bought till they died. Finding that erotic, I head to the lake nearby stripping clothes as I drive slowly while singing Russian speed metal softly. Start the boat on the trailer and then it overheated really bad. Smoke billowing from everywhere! I grab my glass bong and my lighter to fix the motor McGyver style, so I got my tongue stuck in the carburetor and screamed like a little girl. Screw fishing today,I'm going bowling.

The balls are very heavy to lift without tongue properly in place. I'm going exploring with my tongue. The pin setter simply looks erotic,so i decided to deep throat a bowling pin. Then I shoved it in my lunch box so AlmostGone wouldn't be to jealous of my oral skills and ask me to drop the videos of him lost in the Pink Pussycat Theater with naked midgets, dancing around him. Then i walked to the bar,drank from boot and smelled the disgusting foot cheese I didn't clean. Then I vomited my breakfast sandwich out the window onto LithiumBaby's round,but firm mammaries. She then vomited green play dough out her nose. She bitch slapped me until comatose. Then she kicked me in the balls until i cried like an unpaid tranny prostitute. She's one bad-ass! In the meantime,Hidinginshadows is laughing at Chuck Norris while he is sucking Demonic's dick. Boy, can Chuck swallow a lot, Then he decided to reach around and grab a set of nunchucks. Lubricating them up, and inserted into my prolapsed scphinter, and it hurt! Sperm was dripping from my nose. Whatta bad day!

Time for lunch,moldy kimchee again ,which reminded me of something from that movie "Airplane". I bite into it and feel something really squishy. I look down at my lunch and see a piece of jellyfish! Seems Riada switched my lunch with some seafood special! Why would she do that to my dog food. Not sure how,or even why, she would do the old switch. Strange,but tasty, I eat the entire foot long and then grab a frosty mug of flat soda. Boy was that hitting the spot!

Now I head to the pet store and buy 2 cute gerbils, to stick them in Uno's nostrils. I think he will need some pliers to help remove them from his sore snot passages. "Puffs" wont help,damn lazy hyena! Drive to the overpriced home cheapo, and get a box of screws so i can build a cage to put the case of beer so the gerbils feel at home. Those damn drunks! Why do they stink like shit ? Once the cage is finished i took a shit. Boy I'm Smelly! Into the shower, to clean my crab infested crotch. ""Ichatta!" I scream. Hot water on my inimical nereid! I jump out of the shower, dry myself off, and my toe cheese is still flaming hot red, grab the tinactin,and inhale the viridescent Cutaneus mastocytosis. That was when I realized I had bad herpes.

On my way to the hospital, I was followed by a purple one eyed monster who's name is Crazy Blonde chick. Boy she's UGLY! The doctor said," Stop jerking off. If you don't, You will loose sensation in your dapplegray pneumatic sackbut." Terrorized of the thought of losing my livelyhood I reach into my cache of erotic rubberbands and sprinklers to only find cobwebs and moths. Rattlehead stole everything !

Off to the "toy" store with my cache to find a new tomato red flesh light. A bellicose griffin jumped in front of my car and guts splattered all over my piece of shit Yugo Hatchback speedster! A malordorous overlay to my shitty day i am having so far. I think its time to go home and sleep an hope for a nice quite night at home. Unfortunately I cant sleep without my cuddly baby blanket. Pictures of Manehawk being arrested are soothing to me, as is regicide of the hotdog. I think of him showering with me one day as I breathe slowly smoking my marlboros. He's so hot! Sal volatile, quick!

Time for bed need to rest The next day, a truculent ibex ferociously attacked me. That fat bastard! The ibex mangled my pinky finger. God damn it! Now i have no pinky finger to pick my nose with. Great horny toads! Whats a fat man going to eat without his snot-picker? Maybe some Salo? Or some mustard? Holy fucking chicken! Roasting a pigeon is the best! Need a beer so i can pick my wedding dress, burlap,fiberglass,chainmail? I'm so hot! I love my gay lover "Bob" slobbing my knob. I walk to the liquor store to buy Absinthe and skunky beer. I need money for more cocaine and crack whores with no teeth.YAY gum jobs! The skankier the bitches the better! Stop by misterpats to buy cocaine and found out he's no woman. In fact he's a well equipped guy who likes wearing womens clothing under his normal bra and panties. Wow! Who knew? CULES WERE EVERYWHERE!!! Even Columbo couldn't top MrPats outfit. what a sight! POOR MIXED-UP GUY!

The next day, at work I discovered that a furry pussy cat scratched my face. It got infected and puss was oozing from my face and asshole. With gangrene imminent, I quickly call Frankie, "Come suck disgusting infectious wounds!" Licking his lips, after daisy chaining a few men, clamped down and wouldn't let go of my left earlobe so now i hear hot breath whispering "Ich dien!" wow what the fuck, your GAY!!! and smell like stale fumunda cheese. Whew I stink! I need delousing! And some douching!!! I clean my left arm pit, to no avail

Nor but in sleep findeth a cure for care.
Incertainty that once gave scope to dream
Of laughing enterprise and glory untold,
Is now a blackness that no stars redeem.

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9 years 11 months ago #542 by lioneltrainguy
Replied by lioneltrainguy on topic Three Word Story
Today, I went to fuckin work and farted profusely on my coworkers and it smelled like dead gerbils. So the coworkers decided to beat me senseless till I lost control of my bowels. I got up and felt a sharp pain in My groin area. So i screamed, "HOLY FUCKING SHIT!, call the doctor!" The doctor said, "ice your balls". I said, "why?" he said, "because, balls are swollen." I wonder how I got kicked and it hurts.

I'm driving home, balls hanging down to My knees. I pick them up, they have warts. So I'm home taking it easy, drinkin' a beer when suddenly I have no smokes and consider castration.

The next day i lick myself and find LTG kicking my ass and then licking the TV screen. I quickly dressed and headed to the closet brothel to find me a hot hooker with hairy armpits who looked like Joey Lauren Adams. After this, I went to Pathmark to buy protection from this skanky dirty meat hole. But instead I sat on my sweaty swollen balls and played with those little things. I got hungry and ate some wet dog food from the garbage from last week. It was delicious! Then I noticed my nose bleeding from to much Powdered Phororhacos Bill. I grab my big 10 inch black rubber dildo and head to The Town Square where i proceed to touch myself. Meanwhile, the 10" black rubber dildo is still lost and I'm worried it will never be recovered from the thief who stole my toy. I'm so mad! Hopefully someone will choke my chicken or perhaps will demonic do it? You never know. He's that type, that damn homo.

I look outside and its raining so i dance. Then the police stopped by to test out there new and improved cavity search program. Now my sphincter has been widened beyond repair. Now it is prolapsed. I call my pimp and say,"tighten it up!" she giggled with much enthusiasm about seeing me naked and freshly violated, causing sexual tension between us two. It was hard and i couldn't hold my bowels for much longer! My pimp stuck a cork in it, and said,"in your ass is a surprise!" Later that night, after all the canned beans were opened and eaten, I watched TV. Those Ghost Adventurers sure do SUCK! My sphincter clenching, in pain from having butt sex way to much. Should use lubricant instead of glue made for shoes! Now my pubes are glued together and it ITCHES!

The next day I woke up and forgot to remove my underwear from my sticky, smelly private parts. It was hard to peel them off my balls,but i managed to wax myself totally Brazilian style. I then discovered my left nut was mysteriously missing. Now I'm Pissed that I have only one nut. But, life goes on and I'm having an orgasm. It seems like I function fine, cause it splattered purple goo from my third eye.

So for breakfast i went to my local Hooters. The waitress suggested I cover my hairy chest with her hairy chest. What a sight! So I did. Boy did we create a scene! The local newspaper reported that we started a new spicy breakfast sandwich. It was sooo spicy even Demonic rated it X.

After breakfast I went to Walmart to buy worms. I plan on getting real kinky while fishing today. I stop home and grab my new 10" dildo, which is smaller than the fish, but it comes with a violent temper. I prep myself for anything that could possibly go wrong with the violent implement. I'm nervous that I might enjoy it less than I planned on. I drive to Rockland Psychiatric Hospital and the orderlies were chasing around a three legged dog in the cafeteria. I freak and call Misterpat while masturbating to Master Of Puppets. He said not to give chase and I'm babbling. He hangs up. Miffed I pick up an icepick and stab the worms i bought till they died. Finding that erotic, I head to the lake nearby stripping clothes as I drive slowly while singing Russian speed metal softly. Start the boat on the trailer and then it overheated really bad. Smoke billowing from everywhere! I grab my glass bong and my lighter to fix the motor McGyver style, so I got my tongue stuck in the carburetor and screamed like a little girl. Screw fishing today,I'm going bowling.

The balls are very heavy to lift without tongue properly in place. I'm going exploring with my tongue. The pin setter simply looks erotic,so i decided to deep throat a bowling pin. Then I shoved it in my lunch box so AlmostGone wouldn't be to jealous of my oral skills and ask me to drop the videos of him lost in the Pink Pussycat Theater with naked midgets, dancing around him. Then i walked to the bar,drank from boot and smelled the disgusting foot cheese I didn't clean. Then I vomited my breakfast sandwich out the window onto LithiumBaby's round,but firm mammaries. She then vomited green play dough out her nose. She bitch slapped me until comatose. Then she kicked me in the balls until i cried like an unpaid tranny prostitute. She's one bad-ass! In the meantime,Hidinginshadows is laughing at Chuck Norris while he is sucking Demonic's dick. Boy, can Chuck swallow a lot, Then he decided to reach around and grab a set of nunchucks. Lubricating them up, and inserted into my prolapsed scphinter, and it hurt! Sperm was dripping from my nose. Whatta bad day!

Time for lunch,moldy kimchee again ,which reminded me of something from that movie "Airplane". I bite into it and feel something really squishy. I look down at my lunch and see a piece of jellyfish! Seems Riada switched my lunch with some seafood special! Why would she do that to my dog food. Not sure how,or even why, she would do the old switch. Strange,but tasty, I eat the entire foot long and then grab a frosty mug of flat soda. Boy was that hitting the spot!

Now I head to the pet store and buy 2 cute gerbils, to stick them in Uno's nostrils. I think he will need some pliers to help remove them from his sore snot passages. "Puffs" wont help,damn lazy hyena! Drive to the overpriced home cheapo, and get a box of screws so i can build a cage to put the case of beer so the gerbils feel at home. Those damn drunks! Why do they stink like shit ? Once the cage is finished i took a shit. Boy I'm Smelly! Into the shower, to clean my crab infested crotch. ""Ichatta!" I scream. Hot water on my inimical nereid! I jump out of the shower, dry myself off, and my toe cheese is still flaming hot red, grab the tinactin,and inhale the viridescent Cutaneus mastocytosis. That was when I realized I had bad herpes.

On my way to the hospital, I was followed by a purple one eyed monster who's name is Crazy Blonde chick. Boy she's UGLY! The doctor said," Stop jerking off. If you don't, You will loose sensation in your dapplegray pneumatic sackbut." Terrorized of the thought of losing my livelyhood I reach into my cache of erotic rubberbands and sprinklers to only find cobwebs and moths. Rattlehead stole everything !

Off to the "toy" store with my cache to find a new tomato red flesh light. A bellicose griffin jumped in front of my car and guts splattered all over my piece of shit Yugo Hatchback speedster! A malordorous overlay to my shitty day i am having so far. I think its time to go home and sleep an hope for a nice quite night at home. Unfortunately I cant sleep without my cuddly baby blanket. Pictures of Manehawk being arrested are soothing to me, as is regicide of the hotdog. I think of him showering with me one day as I breathe slowly smoking my marlboros. He's so hot! Sal volatile, quick!

Time for bed need to rest The next day, a truculent ibex ferociously attacked me. That fat bastard! The ibex mangled my pinky finger. God damn it! Now i have no pinky finger to pick my nose with. Great horny toads! Whats a fat man going to eat without his snot-picker? Maybe some Salo? Or some mustard? Holy fucking chicken! Roasting a pigeon is the best! Need a beer so i can pick my wedding dress, burlap,fiberglass,chainmail? I'm so hot! I love my gay lover "Bob" slobbing my knob. I walk to the liquor store to buy Absinthe and skunky beer. I need money for more cocaine and crack whores with no teeth.YAY gum jobs! The skankier the bitches the better! Stop by misterpats to buy cocaine and found out he's no woman. In fact he's a well equipped guy who likes wearing womens clothing under his normal bra and panties. Wow! Who knew? CULES WERE EVERYWHERE!!! Even Columbo couldn't top MrPats outfit. what a sight! POOR MIXED-UP GUY!

The next day, at work I discovered that a furry pussy cat scratched my face. It got infected and puss was oozing from my face and asshole. With gangrene imminent, I quickly call Frankie, "Come suck disgusting infectious wounds!" Licking his lips, after daisy chaining a few men, clamped down and wouldn't let go of my left earlobe so now i hear hot breath whispering "Ich dien!" wow what the fuck, your GAY!!! and smell like stale fumunda cheese. Whew I stink! I need delousing! And some douching!!! I clean my left arm pit, to no avail, it still smells

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9 years 11 months ago #543 by misterpat
Replied by misterpat on topic Three Word Story
Today, I went to fuckin work and farted profusely on my coworkers and it smelled like dead gerbils. So the coworkers decided to beat me senseless till I lost control of my bowels. I got up and felt a sharp pain in My groin area. So i screamed, "HOLY FUCKING SHIT!, call the doctor!" The doctor said, "ice your balls". I said, "why?" he said, "because, balls are swollen." I wonder how I got kicked and it hurts.

I'm driving home, balls hanging down to My knees. I pick them up, they have warts. So I'm home taking it easy, drinkin' a beer when suddenly I have no smokes and consider castration.

The next day i lick myself and find LTG kicking my ass and then licking the TV screen. I quickly dressed and headed to the closet brothel to find me a hot hooker with hairy armpits who looked like Joey Lauren Adams. After this, I went to Pathmark to buy protection from this skanky dirty meat hole. But instead I sat on my sweaty swollen balls and played with those little things. I got hungry and ate some wet dog food from the garbage from last week. It was delicious! Then I noticed my nose bleeding from to much Powdered Phororhacos Bill. I grab my big 10 inch black rubber dildo and head to The Town Square where i proceed to touch myself. Meanwhile, the 10" black rubber dildo is still lost and I'm worried it will never be recovered from the thief who stole my toy. I'm so mad! Hopefully someone will choke my chicken or perhaps will demonic do it? You never know. He's that type, that damn homo.

I look outside and its raining so i dance. Then the police stopped by to test out there new and improved cavity search program. Now my sphincter has been widened beyond repair. Now it is prolapsed. I call my pimp and say,"tighten it up!" she giggled with much enthusiasm about seeing me naked and freshly violated, causing sexual tension between us two. It was hard and i couldn't hold my bowels for much longer! My pimp stuck a cork in it, and said,"in your ass is a surprise!" Later that night, after all the canned beans were opened and eaten, I watched TV. Those Ghost Adventurers sure do SUCK! My sphincter clenching, in pain from having butt sex way to much. Should use lubricant instead of glue made for shoes! Now my pubes are glued together and it ITCHES!

The next day I woke up and forgot to remove my underwear from my sticky, smelly private parts. It was hard to peel them off my balls,but i managed to wax myself totally Brazilian style. I then discovered my left nut was mysteriously missing. Now I'm Pissed that I have only one nut. But, life goes on and I'm having an orgasm. It seems like I function fine, cause it splattered purple goo from my third eye.

So for breakfast i went to my local Hooters. The waitress suggested I cover my hairy chest with her hairy chest. What a sight! So I did. Boy did we create a scene! The local newspaper reported that we started a new spicy breakfast sandwich. It was sooo spicy even Demonic rated it X.

After breakfast I went to Walmart to buy worms. I plan on getting real kinky while fishing today. I stop home and grab my new 10" dildo, which is smaller than the fish, but it comes with a violent temper. I prep myself for anything that could possibly go wrong with the violent implement. I'm nervous that I might enjoy it less than I planned on. I drive to Rockland Psychiatric Hospital and the orderlies were chasing around a three legged dog in the cafeteria. I freak and call Misterpat while masturbating to Master Of Puppets. He said not to give chase and I'm babbling. He hangs up. Miffed I pick up an icepick and stab the worms i bought till they died. Finding that erotic, I head to the lake nearby stripping clothes as I drive slowly while singing Russian speed metal softly. Start the boat on the trailer and then it overheated really bad. Smoke billowing from everywhere! I grab my glass bong and my lighter to fix the motor McGyver style, so I got my tongue stuck in the carburetor and screamed like a little girl. Screw fishing today,I'm going bowling.

The balls are very heavy to lift without tongue properly in place. I'm going exploring with my tongue. The pin setter simply looks erotic,so i decided to deep throat a bowling pin. Then I shoved it in my lunch box so AlmostGone wouldn't be to jealous of my oral skills and ask me to drop the videos of him lost in the Pink Pussycat Theater with naked midgets, dancing around him. Then i walked to the bar,drank from boot and smelled the disgusting foot cheese I didn't clean. Then I vomited my breakfast sandwich out the window onto LithiumBaby's round,but firm mammaries. She then vomited green play dough out her nose. She bitch slapped me until comatose. Then she kicked me in the balls until i cried like an unpaid tranny prostitute. She's one bad-ass! In the meantime,Hidinginshadows is laughing at Chuck Norris while he is sucking Demonic's dick. Boy, can Chuck swallow a lot, Then he decided to reach around and grab a set of nunchucks. Lubricating them up, and inserted into my prolapsed scphinter, and it hurt! Sperm was dripping from my nose. Whatta bad day!

Time for lunch,moldy kimchee again ,which reminded me of something from that movie "Airplane". I bite into it and feel something really squishy. I look down at my lunch and see a piece of jellyfish! Seems Riada switched my lunch with some seafood special! Why would she do that to my dog food. Not sure how,or even why, she would do the old switch. Strange,but tasty, I eat the entire foot long and then grab a frosty mug of flat soda. Boy was that hitting the spot!

Now I head to the pet store and buy 2 cute gerbils, to stick them in Uno's nostrils. I think he will need some pliers to help remove them from his sore snot passages. "Puffs" wont help,damn lazy hyena! Drive to the overpriced home cheapo, and get a box of screws so i can build a cage to put the case of beer so the gerbils feel at home. Those damn drunks! Why do they stink like shit ? Once the cage is finished i took a shit. Boy I'm Smelly! Into the shower, to clean my crab infested crotch. ""Ichatta!" I scream. Hot water on my inimical nereid! I jump out of the shower, dry myself off, and my toe cheese is still flaming hot red, grab the tinactin,and inhale the viridescent Cutaneus mastocytosis. That was when I realized I had bad herpes.

On my way to the hospital, I was followed by a purple one eyed monster who's name is Crazy Blonde chick. Boy she's UGLY! The doctor said," Stop jerking off. If you don't, You will loose sensation in your dapplegray pneumatic sackbut." Terrorized of the thought of losing my livelyhood I reach into my cache of erotic rubberbands and sprinklers to only find cobwebs and moths. Rattlehead stole everything !

Off to the "toy" store with my cache to find a new tomato red flesh light. A bellicose griffin jumped in front of my car and guts splattered all over my piece of shit Yugo Hatchback speedster! A malordorous overlay to my shitty day i am having so far. I think its time to go home and sleep an hope for a nice quite night at home. Unfortunately I cant sleep without my cuddly baby blanket. Pictures of Manehawk being arrested are soothing to me, as is regicide of the hotdog. I think of him showering with me one day as I breathe slowly smoking my marlboros. He's so hot! Sal volatile, quick!

Time for bed need to rest The next day, a truculent ibex ferociously attacked me. That fat bastard! The ibex mangled my pinky finger. God damn it! Now i have no pinky finger to pick my nose with. Great horny toads! Whats a fat man going to eat without his snot-picker? Maybe some Salo? Or some mustard? Holy fucking chicken! Roasting a pigeon is the best! Need a beer so i can pick my wedding dress, burlap,fiberglass,chainmail? I'm so hot! I love my gay lover "Bob" slobbing my knob. I walk to the liquor store to buy Absinthe and skunky beer. I need money for more cocaine and crack whores with no teeth.YAY gum jobs! The skankier the bitches the better! Stop by misterpats to buy cocaine and found out he's no woman. In fact he's a well equipped guy who likes wearing womens clothing under his normal bra and panties. Wow! Who knew? CULES WERE EVERYWHERE!!! Even Columbo couldn't top MrPats outfit. what a sight! POOR MIXED-UP GUY!

The next day, at work I discovered that a furry pussy cat scratched my face. It got infected and puss was oozing from my face and asshole. With gangrene imminent, I quickly call Frankie, "Come suck disgusting infectious wounds!" Licking his lips, after daisy chaining a few men, clamped down and wouldn't let go of my left earlobe so now i hear hot breath whispering "Ich dien!" wow what the fuck, your GAY!!! and smell like stale fumunda cheese. Whew I stink! I need delousing! And some douching!!! I clean my left arm pit, to no avail, it still smells. Time for lunch

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9 years 11 months ago #544 by lioneltrainguy
Replied by lioneltrainguy on topic Three Word Story
Today, I went to fuckin work and farted profusely on my coworkers and it smelled like dead gerbils. So the coworkers decided to beat me senseless till I lost control of my bowels. I got up and felt a sharp pain in My groin area. So i screamed, "HOLY FUCKING SHIT!, call the doctor!" The doctor said, "ice your balls". I said, "why?" he said, "because, balls are swollen." I wonder how I got kicked and it hurts.

I'm driving home, balls hanging down to My knees. I pick them up, they have warts. So I'm home taking it easy, drinkin' a beer when suddenly I have no smokes and consider castration.

The next day i lick myself and find LTG kicking my ass and then licking the TV screen. I quickly dressed and headed to the closet brothel to find me a hot hooker with hairy armpits who looked like Joey Lauren Adams. After this, I went to Pathmark to buy protection from this skanky dirty meat hole. But instead I sat on my sweaty swollen balls and played with those little things. I got hungry and ate some wet dog food from the garbage from last week. It was delicious! Then I noticed my nose bleeding from to much Powdered Phororhacos Bill. I grab my big 10 inch black rubber dildo and head to The Town Square where i proceed to touch myself. Meanwhile, the 10" black rubber dildo is still lost and I'm worried it will never be recovered from the thief who stole my toy. I'm so mad! Hopefully someone will choke my chicken or perhaps will demonic do it? You never know. He's that type, that damn homo.

I look outside and its raining so i dance. Then the police stopped by to test out there new and improved cavity search program. Now my sphincter has been widened beyond repair. Now it is prolapsed. I call my pimp and say,"tighten it up!" she giggled with much enthusiasm about seeing me naked and freshly violated, causing sexual tension between us two. It was hard and i couldn't hold my bowels for much longer! My pimp stuck a cork in it, and said,"in your ass is a surprise!" Later that night, after all the canned beans were opened and eaten, I watched TV. Those Ghost Adventurers sure do SUCK! My sphincter clenching, in pain from having butt sex way to much. Should use lubricant instead of glue made for shoes! Now my pubes are glued together and it ITCHES!

The next day I woke up and forgot to remove my underwear from my sticky, smelly private parts. It was hard to peel them off my balls,but i managed to wax myself totally Brazilian style. I then discovered my left nut was mysteriously missing. Now I'm Pissed that I have only one nut. But, life goes on and I'm having an orgasm. It seems like I function fine, cause it splattered purple goo from my third eye.

So for breakfast i went to my local Hooters. The waitress suggested I cover my hairy chest with her hairy chest. What a sight! So I did. Boy did we create a scene! The local newspaper reported that we started a new spicy breakfast sandwich. It was sooo spicy even Demonic rated it X.

After breakfast I went to Walmart to buy worms. I plan on getting real kinky while fishing today. I stop home and grab my new 10" dildo, which is smaller than the fish, but it comes with a violent temper. I prep myself for anything that could possibly go wrong with the violent implement. I'm nervous that I might enjoy it less than I planned on. I drive to Rockland Psychiatric Hospital and the orderlies were chasing around a three legged dog in the cafeteria. I freak and call Misterpat while masturbating to Master Of Puppets. He said not to give chase and I'm babbling. He hangs up. Miffed I pick up an icepick and stab the worms i bought till they died. Finding that erotic, I head to the lake nearby stripping clothes as I drive slowly while singing Russian speed metal softly. Start the boat on the trailer and then it overheated really bad. Smoke billowing from everywhere! I grab my glass bong and my lighter to fix the motor McGyver style, so I got my tongue stuck in the carburetor and screamed like a little girl. Screw fishing today,I'm going bowling.

The balls are very heavy to lift without tongue properly in place. I'm going exploring with my tongue. The pin setter simply looks erotic,so i decided to deep throat a bowling pin. Then I shoved it in my lunch box so AlmostGone wouldn't be to jealous of my oral skills and ask me to drop the videos of him lost in the Pink Pussycat Theater with naked midgets, dancing around him. Then i walked to the bar,drank from boot and smelled the disgusting foot cheese I didn't clean. Then I vomited my breakfast sandwich out the window onto LithiumBaby's round,but firm mammaries. She then vomited green play dough out her nose. She bitch slapped me until comatose. Then she kicked me in the balls until i cried like an unpaid tranny prostitute. She's one bad-ass! In the meantime,Hidinginshadows is laughing at Chuck Norris while he is sucking Demonic's dick. Boy, can Chuck swallow a lot, Then he decided to reach around and grab a set of nunchucks. Lubricating them up, and inserted into my prolapsed scphinter, and it hurt! Sperm was dripping from my nose. Whatta bad day!

Time for lunch,moldy kimchee again ,which reminded me of something from that movie "Airplane". I bite into it and feel something really squishy. I look down at my lunch and see a piece of jellyfish! Seems Riada switched my lunch with some seafood special! Why would she do that to my dog food. Not sure how,or even why, she would do the old switch. Strange,but tasty, I eat the entire foot long and then grab a frosty mug of flat soda. Boy was that hitting the spot!

Now I head to the pet store and buy 2 cute gerbils, to stick them in Uno's nostrils. I think he will need some pliers to help remove them from his sore snot passages. "Puffs" wont help,damn lazy hyena! Drive to the overpriced home cheapo, and get a box of screws so i can build a cage to put the case of beer so the gerbils feel at home. Those damn drunks! Why do they stink like shit ? Once the cage is finished i took a shit. Boy I'm Smelly! Into the shower, to clean my crab infested crotch. ""Ichatta!" I scream. Hot water on my inimical nereid! I jump out of the shower, dry myself off, and my toe cheese is still flaming hot red, grab the tinactin,and inhale the viridescent Cutaneus mastocytosis. That was when I realized I had bad herpes.

On my way to the hospital, I was followed by a purple one eyed monster who's name is Crazy Blonde chick. Boy she's UGLY! The doctor said," Stop jerking off. If you don't, You will loose sensation in your dapplegray pneumatic sackbut." Terrorized of the thought of losing my livelyhood I reach into my cache of erotic rubberbands and sprinklers to only find cobwebs and moths. Rattlehead stole everything !

Off to the "toy" store with my cache to find a new tomato red flesh light. A bellicose griffin jumped in front of my car and guts splattered all over my piece of shit Yugo Hatchback speedster! A malordorous overlay to my shitty day i am having so far. I think its time to go home and sleep an hope for a nice quite night at home. Unfortunately I cant sleep without my cuddly baby blanket. Pictures of Manehawk being arrested are soothing to me, as is regicide of the hotdog. I think of him showering with me one day as I breathe slowly smoking my marlboros. He's so hot! Sal volatile, quick!

Time for bed need to rest The next day, a truculent ibex ferociously attacked me. That fat bastard! The ibex mangled my pinky finger. God damn it! Now i have no pinky finger to pick my nose with. Great horny toads! Whats a fat man going to eat without his snot-picker? Maybe some Salo? Or some mustard? Holy fucking chicken! Roasting a pigeon is the best! Need a beer so i can pick my wedding dress, burlap,fiberglass,chainmail? I'm so hot! I love my gay lover "Bob" slobbing my knob. I walk to the liquor store to buy Absinthe and skunky beer. I need money for more cocaine and crack whores with no teeth.YAY gum jobs! The skankier the bitches the better! Stop by misterpats to buy cocaine and found out he's no woman. In fact he's a well equipped guy who likes wearing womens clothing under his normal bra and panties. Wow! Who knew? CULES WERE EVERYWHERE!!! Even Columbo couldn't top MrPats outfit. what a sight! POOR MIXED-UP GUY!

The next day, at work I discovered that a furry pussy cat scratched my face. It got infected and puss was oozing from my face and asshole. With gangrene imminent, I quickly call Frankie, "Come suck disgusting infectious wounds!" Licking his lips, after daisy chaining a few men, clamped down and wouldn't let go of my left earlobe so now i hear hot breath whispering "Ich dien!" wow what the fuck, your GAY!!! and smell like stale fumunda cheese. Whew I stink! I need delousing! And some douching!!! I clean my left arm pit, to no avail, it still smells. Time for lunch peanut butter & bologna

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9 years 11 months ago #545 by riada
Replied by riada on topic Three Word Story
Today, I went to fuckin work and farted profusely on my coworkers and it smelled like dead gerbils. So the coworkers decided to beat me senseless till I lost control of my bowels. I got up and felt a sharp pain in My groin area. So i screamed, "HOLY FUCKING SHIT!, call the doctor!" The doctor said, "ice your balls". I said, "why?" he said, "because, balls are swollen." I wonder how I got kicked and it hurts.

I'm driving home, balls hanging down to My knees. I pick them up, they have warts. So I'm home taking it easy, drinkin' a beer when suddenly I have no smokes and consider castration.

The next day i lick myself and find LTG kicking my ass and then licking the TV screen. I quickly dressed and headed to the closet brothel to find me a hot hooker with hairy armpits who looked like Joey Lauren Adams. After this, I went to Pathmark to buy protection from this skanky dirty meat hole. But instead I sat on my sweaty swollen balls and played with those little things. I got hungry and ate some wet dog food from the garbage from last week. It was delicious! Then I noticed my nose bleeding from to much Powdered Phororhacos Bill. I grab my big 10 inch black rubber dildo and head to The Town Square where i proceed to touch myself. Meanwhile, the 10" black rubber dildo is still lost and I'm worried it will never be recovered from the thief who stole my toy. I'm so mad! Hopefully someone will choke my chicken or perhaps will demonic do it? You never know. He's that type, that damn homo.

I look outside and its raining so i dance. Then the police stopped by to test out there new and improved cavity search program. Now my sphincter has been widened beyond repair. Now it is prolapsed. I call my pimp and say,"tighten it up!" she giggled with much enthusiasm about seeing me naked and freshly violated, causing sexual tension between us two. It was hard and i couldn't hold my bowels for much longer! My pimp stuck a cork in it, and said,"in your ass is a surprise!" Later that night, after all the canned beans were opened and eaten, I watched TV. Those Ghost Adventurers sure do SUCK! My sphincter clenching, in pain from having butt sex way to much. Should use lubricant instead of glue made for shoes! Now my pubes are glued together and it ITCHES!

The next day I woke up and forgot to remove my underwear from my sticky, smelly private parts. It was hard to peel them off my balls,but i managed to wax myself totally Brazilian style. I then discovered my left nut was mysteriously missing. Now I'm Pissed that I have only one nut. But, life goes on and I'm having an orgasm. It seems like I function fine, cause it splattered purple goo from my third eye.

So for breakfast i went to my local Hooters. The waitress suggested I cover my hairy chest with her hairy chest. What a sight! So I did. Boy did we create a scene! The local newspaper reported that we started a new spicy breakfast sandwich. It was sooo spicy even Demonic rated it X.

After breakfast I went to Walmart to buy worms. I plan on getting real kinky while fishing today. I stop home and grab my new 10" dildo, which is smaller than the fish, but it comes with a violent temper. I prep myself for anything that could possibly go wrong with the violent implement. I'm nervous that I might enjoy it less than I planned on. I drive to Rockland Psychiatric Hospital and the orderlies were chasing around a three legged dog in the cafeteria. I freak and call Misterpat while masturbating to Master Of Puppets. He said not to give chase and I'm babbling. He hangs up. Miffed I pick up an icepick and stab the worms i bought till they died. Finding that erotic, I head to the lake nearby stripping clothes as I drive slowly while singing Russian speed metal softly. Start the boat on the trailer and then it overheated really bad. Smoke billowing from everywhere! I grab my glass bong and my lighter to fix the motor McGyver style, so I got my tongue stuck in the carburetor and screamed like a little girl. Screw fishing today,I'm going bowling.

The balls are very heavy to lift without tongue properly in place. I'm going exploring with my tongue. The pin setter simply looks erotic,so i decided to deep throat a bowling pin. Then I shoved it in my lunch box so AlmostGone wouldn't be to jealous of my oral skills and ask me to drop the videos of him lost in the Pink Pussycat Theater with naked midgets, dancing around him. Then i walked to the bar,drank from boot and smelled the disgusting foot cheese I didn't clean. Then I vomited my breakfast sandwich out the window onto LithiumBaby's round,but firm mammaries. She then vomited green play dough out her nose. She bitch slapped me until comatose. Then she kicked me in the balls until i cried like an unpaid tranny prostitute. She's one bad-ass! In the meantime,Hidinginshadows is laughing at Chuck Norris while he is sucking Demonic's dick. Boy, can Chuck swallow a lot, Then he decided to reach around and grab a set of nunchucks. Lubricating them up, and inserted into my prolapsed scphinter, and it hurt! Sperm was dripping from my nose. Whatta bad day!

Time for lunch,moldy kimchee again ,which reminded me of something from that movie "Airplane". I bite into it and feel something really squishy. I look down at my lunch and see a piece of jellyfish! Seems Riada switched my lunch with some seafood special! Why would she do that to my dog food. Not sure how,or even why, she would do the old switch. Strange,but tasty, I eat the entire foot long and then grab a frosty mug of flat soda. Boy was that hitting the spot!

Now I head to the pet store and buy 2 cute gerbils, to stick them in Uno's nostrils. I think he will need some pliers to help remove them from his sore snot passages. "Puffs" wont help,damn lazy hyena! Drive to the overpriced home cheapo, and get a box of screws so i can build a cage to put the case of beer so the gerbils feel at home. Those damn drunks! Why do they stink like shit ? Once the cage is finished i took a shit. Boy I'm Smelly! Into the shower, to clean my crab infested crotch. ""Ichatta!" I scream. Hot water on my inimical nereid! I jump out of the shower, dry myself off, and my toe cheese is still flaming hot red, grab the tinactin,and inhale the viridescent Cutaneus mastocytosis. That was when I realized I had bad herpes.

On my way to the hospital, I was followed by a purple one eyed monster who's name is Crazy Blonde chick. Boy she's UGLY! The doctor said," Stop jerking off. If you don't, You will loose sensation in your dapplegray pneumatic sackbut." Terrorized of the thought of losing my livelyhood I reach into my cache of erotic rubberbands and sprinklers to only find cobwebs and moths. Rattlehead stole everything !

Off to the "toy" store with my cache to find a new tomato red flesh light. A bellicose griffin jumped in front of my car and guts splattered all over my piece of shit Yugo Hatchback speedster! A malordorous overlay to my shitty day i am having so far. I think its time to go home and sleep an hope for a nice quite night at home. Unfortunately I cant sleep without my cuddly baby blanket. Pictures of Manehawk being arrested are soothing to me, as is regicide of the hotdog. I think of him showering with me one day as I breathe slowly smoking my marlboros. He's so hot! Sal volatile, quick!

Time for bed need to rest The next day, a truculent ibex ferociously attacked me. That fat bastard! The ibex mangled my pinky finger. God damn it! Now i have no pinky finger to pick my nose with. Great horny toads! Whats a fat man going to eat without his snot-picker? Maybe some Salo? Or some mustard? Holy fucking chicken! Roasting a pigeon is the best! Need a beer so i can pick my wedding dress, burlap,fiberglass,chainmail? I'm so hot! I love my gay lover "Bob" slobbing my knob. I walk to the liquor store to buy Absinthe and skunky beer. I need money for more cocaine and crack whores with no teeth.YAY gum jobs! The skankier the bitches the better! Stop by misterpats to buy cocaine and found out he's no woman. In fact he's a well equipped guy who likes wearing womens clothing under his normal bra and panties. Wow! Who knew? CULES WERE EVERYWHERE!!! Even Columbo couldn't top MrPats outfit. what a sight! POOR MIXED-UP GUY!

The next day, at work I discovered that a furry pussy cat scratched my face. It got infected and puss was oozing from my face and asshole. With gangrene imminent, I quickly call Frankie, "Come suck disgusting infectious wounds!" Licking his lips, after daisy chaining a few men, clamped down and wouldn't let go of my left earlobe so now i hear hot breath whispering "Ich dien!" wow what the fuck, your GAY!!! and smell like stale fumunda cheese. Whew I stink! I need delousing! And some douching!!! I clean my left arm pit, to no avail, it still smells. Time for lunch peanut butter & bologna,Myseost and Natto

Nor but in sleep findeth a cure for care.
Incertainty that once gave scope to dream
Of laughing enterprise and glory untold,
Is now a blackness that no stars redeem.

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9 years 11 months ago #546 by misterpat
Replied by misterpat on topic Three Word Story
Today, I went to fuckin work and farted profusely on my coworkers and it smelled like dead gerbils. So the coworkers decided to beat me senseless till I lost control of my bowels. I got up and felt a sharp pain in My groin area. So i screamed, "HOLY FUCKING SHIT!, call the doctor!" The doctor said, "ice your balls". I said, "why?" he said, "because, balls are swollen." I wonder how I got kicked and it hurts.

I'm driving home, balls hanging down to My knees. I pick them up, they have warts. So I'm home taking it easy, drinkin' a beer when suddenly I have no smokes and consider castration.

The next day i lick myself and find LTG kicking my ass and then licking the TV screen. I quickly dressed and headed to the closet brothel to find me a hot hooker with hairy armpits who looked like Joey Lauren Adams. After this, I went to Pathmark to buy protection from this skanky dirty meat hole. But instead I sat on my sweaty swollen balls and played with those little things. I got hungry and ate some wet dog food from the garbage from last week. It was delicious! Then I noticed my nose bleeding from to much Powdered Phororhacos Bill. I grab my big 10 inch black rubber dildo and head to The Town Square where i proceed to touch myself. Meanwhile, the 10" black rubber dildo is still lost and I'm worried it will never be recovered from the thief who stole my toy. I'm so mad! Hopefully someone will choke my chicken or perhaps will demonic do it? You never know. He's that type, that damn homo.

I look outside and its raining so i dance. Then the police stopped by to test out there new and improved cavity search program. Now my sphincter has been widened beyond repair. Now it is prolapsed. I call my pimp and say,"tighten it up!" she giggled with much enthusiasm about seeing me naked and freshly violated, causing sexual tension between us two. It was hard and i couldn't hold my bowels for much longer! My pimp stuck a cork in it, and said,"in your ass is a surprise!" Later that night, after all the canned beans were opened and eaten, I watched TV. Those Ghost Adventurers sure do SUCK! My sphincter clenching, in pain from having butt sex way to much. Should use lubricant instead of glue made for shoes! Now my pubes are glued together and it ITCHES!

The next day I woke up and forgot to remove my underwear from my sticky, smelly private parts. It was hard to peel them off my balls,but i managed to wax myself totally Brazilian style. I then discovered my left nut was mysteriously missing. Now I'm Pissed that I have only one nut. But, life goes on and I'm having an orgasm. It seems like I function fine, cause it splattered purple goo from my third eye.

So for breakfast i went to my local Hooters. The waitress suggested I cover my hairy chest with her hairy chest. What a sight! So I did. Boy did we create a scene! The local newspaper reported that we started a new spicy breakfast sandwich. It was sooo spicy even Demonic rated it X.

After breakfast I went to Walmart to buy worms. I plan on getting real kinky while fishing today. I stop home and grab my new 10" dildo, which is smaller than the fish, but it comes with a violent temper. I prep myself for anything that could possibly go wrong with the violent implement. I'm nervous that I might enjoy it less than I planned on. I drive to Rockland Psychiatric Hospital and the orderlies were chasing around a three legged dog in the cafeteria. I freak and call Misterpat while masturbating to Master Of Puppets. He said not to give chase and I'm babbling. He hangs up. Miffed I pick up an icepick and stab the worms i bought till they died. Finding that erotic, I head to the lake nearby stripping clothes as I drive slowly while singing Russian speed metal softly. Start the boat on the trailer and then it overheated really bad. Smoke billowing from everywhere! I grab my glass bong and my lighter to fix the motor McGyver style, so I got my tongue stuck in the carburetor and screamed like a little girl. Screw fishing today,I'm going bowling.

The balls are very heavy to lift without tongue properly in place. I'm going exploring with my tongue. The pin setter simply looks erotic,so i decided to deep throat a bowling pin. Then I shoved it in my lunch box so AlmostGone wouldn't be to jealous of my oral skills and ask me to drop the videos of him lost in the Pink Pussycat Theater with naked midgets, dancing around him. Then i walked to the bar,drank from boot and smelled the disgusting foot cheese I didn't clean. Then I vomited my breakfast sandwich out the window onto LithiumBaby's round,but firm mammaries. She then vomited green play dough out her nose. She bitch slapped me until comatose. Then she kicked me in the balls until i cried like an unpaid tranny prostitute. She's one bad-ass! In the meantime,Hidinginshadows is laughing at Chuck Norris while he is sucking Demonic's dick. Boy, can Chuck swallow a lot, Then he decided to reach around and grab a set of nunchucks. Lubricating them up, and inserted into my prolapsed scphinter, and it hurt! Sperm was dripping from my nose. Whatta bad day!

Time for lunch,moldy kimchee again ,which reminded me of something from that movie "Airplane". I bite into it and feel something really squishy. I look down at my lunch and see a piece of jellyfish! Seems Riada switched my lunch with some seafood special! Why would she do that to my dog food. Not sure how,or even why, she would do the old switch. Strange,but tasty, I eat the entire foot long and then grab a frosty mug of flat soda. Boy was that hitting the spot!

Now I head to the pet store and buy 2 cute gerbils, to stick them in Uno's nostrils. I think he will need some pliers to help remove them from his sore snot passages. "Puffs" wont help,damn lazy hyena! Drive to the overpriced home cheapo, and get a box of screws so i can build a cage to put the case of beer so the gerbils feel at home. Those damn drunks! Why do they stink like shit ? Once the cage is finished i took a shit. Boy I'm Smelly! Into the shower, to clean my crab infested crotch. ""Ichatta!" I scream. Hot water on my inimical nereid! I jump out of the shower, dry myself off, and my toe cheese is still flaming hot red, grab the tinactin,and inhale the viridescent Cutaneus mastocytosis. That was when I realized I had bad herpes.

On my way to the hospital, I was followed by a purple one eyed monster who's name is Crazy Blonde chick. Boy she's UGLY! The doctor said," Stop jerking off. If you don't, You will loose sensation in your dapplegray pneumatic sackbut." Terrorized of the thought of losing my livelyhood I reach into my cache of erotic rubberbands and sprinklers to only find cobwebs and moths. Rattlehead stole everything !

Off to the "toy" store with my cache to find a new tomato red flesh light. A bellicose griffin jumped in front of my car and guts splattered all over my piece of shit Yugo Hatchback speedster! A malordorous overlay to my shitty day i am having so far. I think its time to go home and sleep an hope for a nice quite night at home. Unfortunately I cant sleep without my cuddly baby blanket. Pictures of Manehawk being arrested are soothing to me, as is regicide of the hotdog. I think of him showering with me one day as I breathe slowly smoking my marlboros. He's so hot! Sal volatile, quick!

Time for bed need to rest The next day, a truculent ibex ferociously attacked me. That fat bastard! The ibex mangled my pinky finger. God damn it! Now i have no pinky finger to pick my nose with. Great horny toads! Whats a fat man going to eat without his snot-picker? Maybe some Salo? Or some mustard? Holy fucking chicken! Roasting a pigeon is the best! Need a beer so i can pick my wedding dress, burlap,fiberglass,chainmail? I'm so hot! I love my gay lover "Bob" slobbing my knob. I walk to the liquor store to buy Absinthe and skunky beer. I need money for more cocaine and crack whores with no teeth.YAY gum jobs! The skankier the bitches the better! Stop by misterpats to buy cocaine and found out he's no woman. In fact he's a well equipped guy who likes wearing womens clothing under his normal bra and panties. Wow! Who knew? CULES WERE EVERYWHERE!!! Even Columbo couldn't top MrPats outfit. what a sight! POOR MIXED-UP GUY!

The next day, at work I discovered that a furry pussy cat scratched my face. It got infected and puss was oozing from my face and asshole. With gangrene imminent, I quickly call Frankie, "Come suck disgusting infectious wounds!" Licking his lips, after daisy chaining a few men, clamped down and wouldn't let go of my left earlobe so now i hear hot breath whispering "Ich dien!" wow what the fuck, your GAY!!! and smell like stale fumunda cheese. Whew I stink! I need delousing! And some douching!!! I clean my left arm pit, to no avail, it still smells. Time for lunch. Peanut butter & bologna,Myseost and Natto don't hold a

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9 years 11 months ago #547 by riada
Replied by riada on topic Three Word Story
Today, I went to fuckin work and farted profusely on my coworkers and it smelled like dead gerbils. So the coworkers decided to beat me senseless till I lost control of my bowels. I got up and felt a sharp pain in My groin area. So i screamed, "HOLY FUCKING SHIT!, call the doctor!" The doctor said, "ice your balls". I said, "why?" he said, "because, balls are swollen." I wonder how I got kicked and it hurts.

I'm driving home, balls hanging down to My knees. I pick them up, they have warts. So I'm home taking it easy, drinkin' a beer when suddenly I have no smokes and consider castration.

The next day i lick myself and find LTG kicking my ass and then licking the TV screen. I quickly dressed and headed to the closet brothel to find me a hot hooker with hairy armpits who looked like Joey Lauren Adams. After this, I went to Pathmark to buy protection from this skanky dirty meat hole. But instead I sat on my sweaty swollen balls and played with those little things. I got hungry and ate some wet dog food from the garbage from last week. It was delicious! Then I noticed my nose bleeding from to much Powdered Phororhacos Bill. I grab my big 10 inch black rubber dildo and head to The Town Square where i proceed to touch myself. Meanwhile, the 10" black rubber dildo is still lost and I'm worried it will never be recovered from the thief who stole my toy. I'm so mad! Hopefully someone will choke my chicken or perhaps will demonic do it? You never know. He's that type, that damn homo.

I look outside and its raining so i dance. Then the police stopped by to test out there new and improved cavity search program. Now my sphincter has been widened beyond repair. Now it is prolapsed. I call my pimp and say,"tighten it up!" she giggled with much enthusiasm about seeing me naked and freshly violated, causing sexual tension between us two. It was hard and i couldn't hold my bowels for much longer! My pimp stuck a cork in it, and said,"in your ass is a surprise!" Later that night, after all the canned beans were opened and eaten, I watched TV. Those Ghost Adventurers sure do SUCK! My sphincter clenching, in pain from having butt sex way to much. Should use lubricant instead of glue made for shoes! Now my pubes are glued together and it ITCHES!

The next day I woke up and forgot to remove my underwear from my sticky, smelly private parts. It was hard to peel them off my balls,but i managed to wax myself totally Brazilian style. I then discovered my left nut was mysteriously missing. Now I'm Pissed that I have only one nut. But, life goes on and I'm having an orgasm. It seems like I function fine, cause it splattered purple goo from my third eye.

So for breakfast i went to my local Hooters. The waitress suggested I cover my hairy chest with her hairy chest. What a sight! So I did. Boy did we create a scene! The local newspaper reported that we started a new spicy breakfast sandwich. It was sooo spicy even Demonic rated it X.

After breakfast I went to Walmart to buy worms. I plan on getting real kinky while fishing today. I stop home and grab my new 10" dildo, which is smaller than the fish, but it comes with a violent temper. I prep myself for anything that could possibly go wrong with the violent implement. I'm nervous that I might enjoy it less than I planned on. I drive to Rockland Psychiatric Hospital and the orderlies were chasing around a three legged dog in the cafeteria. I freak and call Misterpat while masturbating to Master Of Puppets. He said not to give chase and I'm babbling. He hangs up. Miffed I pick up an icepick and stab the worms i bought till they died. Finding that erotic, I head to the lake nearby stripping clothes as I drive slowly while singing Russian speed metal softly. Start the boat on the trailer and then it overheated really bad. Smoke billowing from everywhere! I grab my glass bong and my lighter to fix the motor McGyver style, so I got my tongue stuck in the carburetor and screamed like a little girl. Screw fishing today,I'm going bowling.

The balls are very heavy to lift without tongue properly in place. I'm going exploring with my tongue. The pin setter simply looks erotic,so i decided to deep throat a bowling pin. Then I shoved it in my lunch box so AlmostGone wouldn't be to jealous of my oral skills and ask me to drop the videos of him lost in the Pink Pussycat Theater with naked midgets, dancing around him. Then i walked to the bar,drank from boot and smelled the disgusting foot cheese I didn't clean. Then I vomited my breakfast sandwich out the window onto LithiumBaby's round,but firm mammaries. She then vomited green play dough out her nose. She bitch slapped me until comatose. Then she kicked me in the balls until i cried like an unpaid tranny prostitute. She's one bad-ass! In the meantime,Hidinginshadows is laughing at Chuck Norris while he is sucking Demonic's dick. Boy, can Chuck swallow a lot, Then he decided to reach around and grab a set of nunchucks. Lubricating them up, and inserted into my prolapsed scphinter, and it hurt! Sperm was dripping from my nose. Whatta bad day!

Time for lunch,moldy kimchee again ,which reminded me of something from that movie "Airplane". I bite into it and feel something really squishy. I look down at my lunch and see a piece of jellyfish! Seems Riada switched my lunch with some seafood special! Why would she do that to my dog food. Not sure how,or even why, she would do the old switch. Strange,but tasty, I eat the entire foot long and then grab a frosty mug of flat soda. Boy was that hitting the spot!

Now I head to the pet store and buy 2 cute gerbils, to stick them in Uno's nostrils. I think he will need some pliers to help remove them from his sore snot passages. "Puffs" wont help,damn lazy hyena! Drive to the overpriced home cheapo, and get a box of screws so i can build a cage to put the case of beer so the gerbils feel at home. Those damn drunks! Why do they stink like shit ? Once the cage is finished i took a shit. Boy I'm Smelly! Into the shower, to clean my crab infested crotch. ""Ichatta!" I scream. Hot water on my inimical nereid! I jump out of the shower, dry myself off, and my toe cheese is still flaming hot red, grab the tinactin,and inhale the viridescent Cutaneus mastocytosis. That was when I realized I had bad herpes.

On my way to the hospital, I was followed by a purple one eyed monster who's name is Crazy Blonde chick. Boy she's UGLY! The doctor said," Stop jerking off. If you don't, You will loose sensation in your dapplegray pneumatic sackbut." Terrorized of the thought of losing my livelyhood I reach into my cache of erotic rubberbands and sprinklers to only find cobwebs and moths. Rattlehead stole everything !

Off to the "toy" store with my cache to find a new tomato red flesh light. A bellicose griffin jumped in front of my car and guts splattered all over my piece of shit Yugo Hatchback speedster! A malordorous overlay to my shitty day i am having so far. I think its time to go home and sleep an hope for a nice quite night at home. Unfortunately I cant sleep without my cuddly baby blanket. Pictures of Manehawk being arrested are soothing to me, as is regicide of the hotdog. I think of him showering with me one day as I breathe slowly smoking my marlboros. He's so hot! Sal volatile, quick!

Time for bed need to rest The next day, a truculent ibex ferociously attacked me. That fat bastard! The ibex mangled my pinky finger. God damn it! Now i have no pinky finger to pick my nose with. Great horny toads! Whats a fat man going to eat without his snot-picker? Maybe some Salo? Or some mustard? Holy fucking chicken! Roasting a pigeon is the best! Need a beer so i can pick my wedding dress, burlap,fiberglass,chainmail? I'm so hot! I love my gay lover "Bob" slobbing my knob. I walk to the liquor store to buy Absinthe and skunky beer. I need money for more cocaine and crack whores with no teeth.YAY gum jobs! The skankier the bitches the better! Stop by misterpats to buy cocaine and found out he's no woman. In fact he's a well equipped guy who likes wearing womens clothing under his normal bra and panties. Wow! Who knew? CULES WERE EVERYWHERE!!! Even Columbo couldn't top MrPats outfit. what a sight! POOR MIXED-UP GUY!

The next day, at work I discovered that a furry pussy cat scratched my face. It got infected and puss was oozing from my face and asshole. With gangrene imminent, I quickly call Frankie, "Come suck disgusting infectious wounds!" Licking his lips, after daisy chaining a few men, clamped down and wouldn't let go of my left earlobe so now i hear hot breath whispering "Ich dien!" wow what the fuck, your GAY!!! and smell like stale fumunda cheese. Whew I stink! I need delousing! And some douching!!! I clean my left arm pit, to no avail, it still smells. Time for lunch. Peanut butter & bologna,Myseost and Natto don't hold a candle to Surströmming

Nor but in sleep findeth a cure for care.
Incertainty that once gave scope to dream
Of laughing enterprise and glory untold,
Is now a blackness that no stars redeem.

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More
9 years 11 months ago #548 by misterpat
Replied by misterpat on topic Three Word Story
Today, I went to fuckin work and farted profusely on my coworkers and it smelled like dead gerbils. So the coworkers decided to beat me senseless till I lost control of my bowels. I got up and felt a sharp pain in My groin area. So i screamed, "HOLY FUCKING SHIT!, call the doctor!" The doctor said, "ice your balls". I said, "why?" he said, "because, balls are swollen." I wonder how I got kicked and it hurts.

I'm driving home, balls hanging down to My knees. I pick them up, they have warts. So I'm home taking it easy, drinkin' a beer when suddenly I have no smokes and consider castration.

The next day i lick myself and find LTG kicking my ass and then licking the TV screen. I quickly dressed and headed to the closet brothel to find me a hot hooker with hairy armpits who looked like Joey Lauren Adams. After this, I went to Pathmark to buy protection from this skanky dirty meat hole. But instead I sat on my sweaty swollen balls and played with those little things. I got hungry and ate some wet dog food from the garbage from last week. It was delicious! Then I noticed my nose bleeding from to much Powdered Phororhacos Bill. I grab my big 10 inch black rubber dildo and head to The Town Square where i proceed to touch myself. Meanwhile, the 10" black rubber dildo is still lost and I'm worried it will never be recovered from the thief who stole my toy. I'm so mad! Hopefully someone will choke my chicken or perhaps will demonic do it? You never know. He's that type, that damn homo.

I look outside and its raining so i dance. Then the police stopped by to test out there new and improved cavity search program. Now my sphincter has been widened beyond repair. Now it is prolapsed. I call my pimp and say,"tighten it up!" she giggled with much enthusiasm about seeing me naked and freshly violated, causing sexual tension between us two. It was hard and i couldn't hold my bowels for much longer! My pimp stuck a cork in it, and said,"in your ass is a surprise!" Later that night, after all the canned beans were opened and eaten, I watched TV. Those Ghost Adventurers sure do SUCK! My sphincter clenching, in pain from having butt sex way to much. Should use lubricant instead of glue made for shoes! Now my pubes are glued together and it ITCHES!

The next day I woke up and forgot to remove my underwear from my sticky, smelly private parts. It was hard to peel them off my balls,but i managed to wax myself totally Brazilian style. I then discovered my left nut was mysteriously missing. Now I'm Pissed that I have only one nut. But, life goes on and I'm having an orgasm. It seems like I function fine, cause it splattered purple goo from my third eye.

So for breakfast i went to my local Hooters. The waitress suggested I cover my hairy chest with her hairy chest. What a sight! So I did. Boy did we create a scene! The local newspaper reported that we started a new spicy breakfast sandwich. It was sooo spicy even Demonic rated it X.

After breakfast I went to Walmart to buy worms. I plan on getting real kinky while fishing today. I stop home and grab my new 10" dildo, which is smaller than the fish, but it comes with a violent temper. I prep myself for anything that could possibly go wrong with the violent implement. I'm nervous that I might enjoy it less than I planned on. I drive to Rockland Psychiatric Hospital and the orderlies were chasing around a three legged dog in the cafeteria. I freak and call Misterpat while masturbating to Master Of Puppets. He said not to give chase and I'm babbling. He hangs up. Miffed I pick up an icepick and stab the worms i bought till they died. Finding that erotic, I head to the lake nearby stripping clothes as I drive slowly while singing Russian speed metal softly. Start the boat on the trailer and then it overheated really bad. Smoke billowing from everywhere! I grab my glass bong and my lighter to fix the motor McGyver style, so I got my tongue stuck in the carburetor and screamed like a little girl. Screw fishing today,I'm going bowling.

The balls are very heavy to lift without tongue properly in place. I'm going exploring with my tongue. The pin setter simply looks erotic,so i decided to deep throat a bowling pin. Then I shoved it in my lunch box so AlmostGone wouldn't be to jealous of my oral skills and ask me to drop the videos of him lost in the Pink Pussycat Theater with naked midgets, dancing around him. Then i walked to the bar,drank from boot and smelled the disgusting foot cheese I didn't clean. Then I vomited my breakfast sandwich out the window onto LithiumBaby's round,but firm mammaries. She then vomited green play dough out her nose. She bitch slapped me until comatose. Then she kicked me in the balls until i cried like an unpaid tranny prostitute. She's one bad-ass! In the meantime,Hidinginshadows is laughing at Chuck Norris while he is sucking Demonic's dick. Boy, can Chuck swallow a lot, Then he decided to reach around and grab a set of nunchucks. Lubricating them up, and inserted into my prolapsed scphinter, and it hurt! Sperm was dripping from my nose. Whatta bad day!

Time for lunch,moldy kimchee again ,which reminded me of something from that movie "Airplane". I bite into it and feel something really squishy. I look down at my lunch and see a piece of jellyfish! Seems Riada switched my lunch with some seafood special! Why would she do that to my dog food. Not sure how,or even why, she would do the old switch. Strange,but tasty, I eat the entire foot long and then grab a frosty mug of flat soda. Boy was that hitting the spot!

Now I head to the pet store and buy 2 cute gerbils, to stick them in Uno's nostrils. I think he will need some pliers to help remove them from his sore snot passages. "Puffs" wont help,damn lazy hyena! Drive to the overpriced home cheapo, and get a box of screws so i can build a cage to put the case of beer so the gerbils feel at home. Those damn drunks! Why do they stink like shit ? Once the cage is finished i took a shit. Boy I'm Smelly! Into the shower, to clean my crab infested crotch. ""Ichatta!" I scream. Hot water on my inimical nereid! I jump out of the shower, dry myself off, and my toe cheese is still flaming hot red, grab the tinactin,and inhale the viridescent Cutaneus mastocytosis. That was when I realized I had bad herpes.

On my way to the hospital, I was followed by a purple one eyed monster who's name is Crazy Blonde chick. Boy she's UGLY! The doctor said," Stop jerking off. If you don't, You will loose sensation in your dapplegray pneumatic sackbut." Terrorized of the thought of losing my livelyhood I reach into my cache of erotic rubberbands and sprinklers to only find cobwebs and moths. Rattlehead stole everything !

Off to the "toy" store with my cache to find a new tomato red flesh light. A bellicose griffin jumped in front of my car and guts splattered all over my piece of shit Yugo Hatchback speedster! A malordorous overlay to my shitty day i am having so far. I think its time to go home and sleep an hope for a nice quite night at home. Unfortunately I cant sleep without my cuddly baby blanket. Pictures of Manehawk being arrested are soothing to me, as is regicide of the hotdog. I think of him showering with me one day as I breathe slowly smoking my marlboros. He's so hot! Sal volatile, quick!

Time for bed need to rest The next day, a truculent ibex ferociously attacked me. That fat bastard! The ibex mangled my pinky finger. God damn it! Now i have no pinky finger to pick my nose with. Great horny toads! Whats a fat man going to eat without his snot-picker? Maybe some Salo? Or some mustard? Holy fucking chicken! Roasting a pigeon is the best! Need a beer so i can pick my wedding dress, burlap,fiberglass,chainmail? I'm so hot! I love my gay lover "Bob" slobbing my knob. I walk to the liquor store to buy Absinthe and skunky beer. I need money for more cocaine and crack whores with no teeth.YAY gum jobs! The skankier the bitches the better! Stop by misterpats to buy cocaine and found out he's no woman. In fact he's a well equipped guy who likes wearing womens clothing under his normal bra and panties. Wow! Who knew? CULES WERE EVERYWHERE!!! Even Columbo couldn't top MrPats outfit. what a sight! POOR MIXED-UP GUY!

The next day, at work I discovered that a furry pussy cat scratched my face. It got infected and puss was oozing from my face and asshole. With gangrene imminent, I quickly call Frankie, "Come suck disgusting infectious wounds!" Licking his lips, after daisy chaining a few men, clamped down and wouldn't let go of my left earlobe so now i hear hot breath whispering "Ich dien!" wow what the fuck, your GAY!!! and smell like stale fumunda cheese. Whew I stink! I need delousing! And some douching!!! I clean my left arm pit, to no avail, it still smells. Time for lunch. Peanut butter & bologna,Myseost and Natto don't hold a candle to Surströmming! Later on, I

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9 years 11 months ago #549 by riada
Replied by riada on topic Three Word Story


Today, I went to fuckin work and farted profusely on my coworkers and it smelled like dead gerbils. So the coworkers decided to beat me senseless till I lost control of my bowels. I got up and felt a sharp pain in My groin area. So i screamed, "HOLY FUCKING SHIT!, call the doctor!" The doctor said, "ice your balls". I said, "why?" he said, "because, balls are swollen." I wonder how I got kicked and it hurts.

I'm driving home, balls hanging down to My knees. I pick them up, they have warts. So I'm home taking it easy, drinkin' a beer when suddenly I have no smokes and consider castration.

The next day i lick myself and find LTG kicking my ass and then licking the TV screen. I quickly dressed and headed to the closet brothel to find me a hot hooker with hairy armpits who looked like Joey Lauren Adams. After this, I went to Pathmark to buy protection from this skanky dirty meat hole. But instead I sat on my sweaty swollen balls and played with those little things. I got hungry and ate some wet dog food from the garbage from last week. It was delicious! Then I noticed my nose bleeding from to much Powdered Phororhacos Bill. I grab my big 10 inch black rubber dildo and head to The Town Square where i proceed to touch myself. Meanwhile, the 10" black rubber dildo is still lost and I'm worried it will never be recovered from the thief who stole my toy. I'm so mad! Hopefully someone will choke my chicken or perhaps will demonic do it? You never know. He's that type, that damn homo.

I look outside and its raining so i dance. Then the police stopped by to test out there new and improved cavity search program. Now my sphincter has been widened beyond repair. Now it is prolapsed. I call my pimp and say,"tighten it up!" she giggled with much enthusiasm about seeing me naked and freshly violated, causing sexual tension between us two. It was hard and i couldn't hold my bowels for much longer! My pimp stuck a cork in it, and said,"in your ass is a surprise!" Later that night, after all the canned beans were opened and eaten, I watched TV. Those Ghost Adventurers sure do SUCK! My sphincter clenching, in pain from having butt sex way to much. Should use lubricant instead of glue made for shoes! Now my pubes are glued together and it ITCHES!

The next day I woke up and forgot to remove my underwear from my sticky, smelly private parts. It was hard to peel them off my balls,but i managed to wax myself totally Brazilian style. I then discovered my left nut was mysteriously missing. Now I'm Pissed that I have only one nut. But, life goes on and I'm having an orgasm. It seems like I function fine, cause it splattered purple goo from my third eye.

So for breakfast i went to my local Hooters. The waitress suggested I cover my hairy chest with her hairy chest. What a sight! So I did. Boy did we create a scene! The local newspaper reported that we started a new spicy breakfast sandwich. It was sooo spicy even Demonic rated it X.

After breakfast I went to Walmart to buy worms. I plan on getting real kinky while fishing today. I stop home and grab my new 10" dildo, which is smaller than the fish, but it comes with a violent temper. I prep myself for anything that could possibly go wrong with the violent implement. I'm nervous that I might enjoy it less than I planned on. I drive to Rockland Psychiatric Hospital and the orderlies were chasing around a three legged dog in the cafeteria. I freak and call Misterpat while masturbating to Master Of Puppets. He said not to give chase and I'm babbling. He hangs up. Miffed I pick up an icepick and stab the worms i bought till they died. Finding that erotic, I head to the lake nearby stripping clothes as I drive slowly while singing Russian speed metal softly. Start the boat on the trailer and then it overheated really bad. Smoke billowing from everywhere! I grab my glass bong and my lighter to fix the motor McGyver style, so I got my tongue stuck in the carburetor and screamed like a little girl. Screw fishing today,I'm going bowling.

The balls are very heavy to lift without tongue properly in place. I'm going exploring with my tongue. The pin setter simply looks erotic,so i decided to deep throat a bowling pin. Then I shoved it in my lunch box so AlmostGone wouldn't be to jealous of my oral skills and ask me to drop the videos of him lost in the Pink Pussycat Theater with naked midgets, dancing around him. Then i walked to the bar,drank from boot and smelled the disgusting foot cheese I didn't clean. Then I vomited my breakfast sandwich out the window onto LithiumBaby's round,but firm mammaries. She then vomited green play dough out her nose. She bitch slapped me until comatose. Then she kicked me in the balls until i cried like an unpaid tranny prostitute. She's one bad-ass! In the meantime,Hidinginshadows is laughing at Chuck Norris while he is sucking Demonic's dick. Boy, can Chuck swallow a lot, Then he decided to reach around and grab a set of nunchucks. Lubricating them up, and inserted into my prolapsed scphinter, and it hurt! Sperm was dripping from my nose. Whatta bad day!

Time for lunch,moldy kimchee again ,which reminded me of something from that movie "Airplane". I bite into it and feel something really squishy. I look down at my lunch and see a piece of jellyfish! Seems Riada switched my lunch with some seafood special! Why would she do that to my dog food. Not sure how,or even why, she would do the old switch. Strange,but tasty, I eat the entire foot long and then grab a frosty mug of flat soda. Boy was that hitting the spot!

Now I head to the pet store and buy 2 cute gerbils, to stick them in Uno's nostrils. I think he will need some pliers to help remove them from his sore snot passages. "Puffs" wont help,damn lazy hyena! Drive to the overpriced home cheapo, and get a box of screws so i can build a cage to put the case of beer so the gerbils feel at home. Those damn drunks! Why do they stink like shit ? Once the cage is finished i took a shit. Boy I'm Smelly! Into the shower, to clean my crab infested crotch. ""Ichatta!" I scream. Hot water on my inimical nereid! I jump out of the shower, dry myself off, and my toe cheese is still flaming hot red, grab the tinactin,and inhale the viridescent Cutaneus mastocytosis. That was when I realized I had bad herpes.

On my way to the hospital, I was followed by a purple one eyed monster who's name is Crazy Blonde chick. Boy she's UGLY! The doctor said," Stop jerking off. If you don't, You will loose sensation in your dapplegray pneumatic sackbut." Terrorized of the thought of losing my livelyhood I reach into my cache of erotic rubberbands and sprinklers to only find cobwebs and moths. Rattlehead stole everything !

Off to the "toy" store with my cache to find a new tomato red flesh light. A bellicose griffin jumped in front of my car and guts splattered all over my piece of shit Yugo Hatchback speedster! A malordorous overlay to my shitty day i am having so far. I think its time to go home and sleep an hope for a nice quite night at home. Unfortunately I cant sleep without my cuddly baby blanket. Pictures of Manehawk being arrested are soothing to me, as is regicide of the hotdog. I think of him showering with me one day as I breathe slowly smoking my marlboros. He's so hot! Sal volatile, quick!

Time for bed need to rest The next day, a truculent ibex ferociously attacked me. That fat bastard! The ibex mangled my pinky finger. God damn it! Now i have no pinky finger to pick my nose with. Great horny toads! Whats a fat man going to eat without his snot-picker? Maybe some Salo? Or some mustard? Holy fucking chicken! Roasting a pigeon is the best! Need a beer so i can pick my wedding dress, burlap,fiberglass,chainmail? I'm so hot! I love my gay lover "Bob" slobbing my knob. I walk to the liquor store to buy Absinthe and skunky beer. I need money for more cocaine and crack whores with no teeth.YAY gum jobs! The skankier the bitches the better! Stop by misterpats to buy cocaine and found out he's no woman. In fact he's a well equipped guy who likes wearing womens clothing under his normal bra and panties. Wow! Who knew? CULES WERE EVERYWHERE!!! Even Columbo couldn't top MrPats outfit. what a sight! POOR MIXED-UP GUY!

The next day, at work I discovered that a furry pussy cat scratched my face. It got infected and puss was oozing from my face and asshole. With gangrene imminent, I quickly call Frankie, "Come suck disgusting infectious wounds!" Licking his lips, after daisy chaining a few men, clamped down and wouldn't let go of my left earlobe so now i hear hot breath whispering "Ich dien!" wow what the fuck, your GAY!!! and smell like stale fumunda cheese. Whew I stink! I need delousing! And some douching!!! I clean my left arm pit, to no avail, it still smells. Time for lunch. Peanut butter & bologna,Myseost and Natto don't hold a candle to Surströmming! Later on, I expiscate anomalous verdigris

Nor but in sleep findeth a cure for care.
Incertainty that once gave scope to dream
Of laughing enterprise and glory untold,
Is now a blackness that no stars redeem.

Please Log in or Create an account to join the conversation.

More
9 years 10 months ago #550 by misterpat
Replied by misterpat on topic Three Word Story
Today, I went to fuckin work and farted profusely on my coworkers and it smelled like dead gerbils. So the coworkers decided to beat me senseless till I lost control of my bowels. I got up and felt a sharp pain in My groin area. So i screamed, "HOLY FUCKING SHIT!, call the doctor!" The doctor said, "ice your balls". I said, "why?" he said, "because, balls are swollen." I wonder how I got kicked and it hurts.

I'm driving home, balls hanging down to My knees. I pick them up, they have warts. So I'm home taking it easy, drinkin' a beer when suddenly I have no smokes and consider castration.

The next day i lick myself and find LTG kicking my ass and then licking the TV screen. I quickly dressed and headed to the closet brothel to find me a hot hooker with hairy armpits who looked like Joey Lauren Adams. After this, I went to Pathmark to buy protection from this skanky dirty meat hole. But instead I sat on my sweaty swollen balls and played with those little things. I got hungry and ate some wet dog food from the garbage from last week. It was delicious! Then I noticed my nose bleeding from to much Powdered Phororhacos Bill. I grab my big 10 inch black rubber dildo and head to The Town Square where i proceed to touch myself. Meanwhile, the 10" black rubber dildo is still lost and I'm worried it will never be recovered from the thief who stole my toy. I'm so mad! Hopefully someone will choke my chicken or perhaps will demonic do it? You never know. He's that type, that damn homo.

I look outside and its raining so i dance. Then the police stopped by to test out there new and improved cavity search program. Now my sphincter has been widened beyond repair. Now it is prolapsed. I call my pimp and say,"tighten it up!" she giggled with much enthusiasm about seeing me naked and freshly violated, causing sexual tension between us two. It was hard and i couldn't hold my bowels for much longer! My pimp stuck a cork in it, and said,"in your ass is a surprise!" Later that night, after all the canned beans were opened and eaten, I watched TV. Those Ghost Adventurers sure do SUCK! My sphincter clenching, in pain from having butt sex way to much. Should use lubricant instead of glue made for shoes! Now my pubes are glued together and it ITCHES!

The next day I woke up and forgot to remove my underwear from my sticky, smelly private parts. It was hard to peel them off my balls,but i managed to wax myself totally Brazilian style. I then discovered my left nut was mysteriously missing. Now I'm Pissed that I have only one nut. But, life goes on and I'm having an orgasm. It seems like I function fine, cause it splattered purple goo from my third eye.

So for breakfast i went to my local Hooters. The waitress suggested I cover my hairy chest with her hairy chest. What a sight! So I did. Boy did we create a scene! The local newspaper reported that we started a new spicy breakfast sandwich. It was sooo spicy even Demonic rated it X.

After breakfast I went to Walmart to buy worms. I plan on getting real kinky while fishing today. I stop home and grab my new 10" dildo, which is smaller than the fish, but it comes with a violent temper. I prep myself for anything that could possibly go wrong with the violent implement. I'm nervous that I might enjoy it less than I planned on. I drive to Rockland Psychiatric Hospital and the orderlies were chasing around a three legged dog in the cafeteria. I freak and call Misterpat while masturbating to Master Of Puppets. He said not to give chase and I'm babbling. He hangs up. Miffed I pick up an icepick and stab the worms i bought till they died. Finding that erotic, I head to the lake nearby stripping clothes as I drive slowly while singing Russian speed metal softly. Start the boat on the trailer and then it overheated really bad. Smoke billowing from everywhere! I grab my glass bong and my lighter to fix the motor McGyver style, so I got my tongue stuck in the carburetor and screamed like a little girl. Screw fishing today,I'm going bowling.

The balls are very heavy to lift without tongue properly in place. I'm going exploring with my tongue. The pin setter simply looks erotic,so i decided to deep throat a bowling pin. Then I shoved it in my lunch box so AlmostGone wouldn't be to jealous of my oral skills and ask me to drop the videos of him lost in the Pink Pussycat Theater with naked midgets, dancing around him. Then i walked to the bar,drank from boot and smelled the disgusting foot cheese I didn't clean. Then I vomited my breakfast sandwich out the window onto LithiumBaby's round,but firm mammaries. She then vomited green play dough out her nose. She bitch slapped me until comatose. Then she kicked me in the balls until i cried like an unpaid tranny prostitute. She's one bad-ass! In the meantime,Hidinginshadows is laughing at Chuck Norris while he is sucking Demonic's dick. Boy, can Chuck swallow a lot, Then he decided to reach around and grab a set of nunchucks. Lubricating them up, and inserted into my prolapsed scphinter, and it hurt! Sperm was dripping from my nose. Whatta bad day!

Time for lunch,moldy kimchee again ,which reminded me of something from that movie "Airplane". I bite into it and feel something really squishy. I look down at my lunch and see a piece of jellyfish! Seems Riada switched my lunch with some seafood special! Why would she do that to my dog food. Not sure how,or even why, she would do the old switch. Strange,but tasty, I eat the entire foot long and then grab a frosty mug of flat soda. Boy was that hitting the spot!

Now I head to the pet store and buy 2 cute gerbils, to stick them in Uno's nostrils. I think he will need some pliers to help remove them from his sore snot passages. "Puffs" wont help,damn lazy hyena! Drive to the overpriced home cheapo, and get a box of screws so i can build a cage to put the case of beer so the gerbils feel at home. Those damn drunks! Why do they stink like shit ? Once the cage is finished i took a shit. Boy I'm Smelly! Into the shower, to clean my crab infested crotch. ""Ichatta!" I scream. Hot water on my inimical nereid! I jump out of the shower, dry myself off, and my toe cheese is still flaming hot red, grab the tinactin,and inhale the viridescent Cutaneus mastocytosis. That was when I realized I had bad herpes.

On my way to the hospital, I was followed by a purple one eyed monster who's name is Crazy Blonde chick. Boy she's UGLY! The doctor said," Stop jerking off. If you don't, You will loose sensation in your dapplegray pneumatic sackbut." Terrorized of the thought of losing my livelyhood I reach into my cache of erotic rubberbands and sprinklers to only find cobwebs and moths. Rattlehead stole everything !

Off to the "toy" store with my cache to find a new tomato red flesh light. A bellicose griffin jumped in front of my car and guts splattered all over my piece of shit Yugo Hatchback speedster! A malordorous overlay to my shitty day i am having so far. I think its time to go home and sleep an hope for a nice quite night at home. Unfortunately I cant sleep without my cuddly baby blanket. Pictures of Manehawk being arrested are soothing to me, as is regicide of the hotdog. I think of him showering with me one day as I breathe slowly smoking my marlboros. He's so hot! Sal volatile, quick!

Time for bed need to rest The next day, a truculent ibex ferociously attacked me. That fat bastard! The ibex mangled my pinky finger. God damn it! Now i have no pinky finger to pick my nose with. Great horny toads! Whats a fat man going to eat without his snot-picker? Maybe some Salo? Or some mustard? Holy fucking chicken! Roasting a pigeon is the best! Need a beer so i can pick my wedding dress, burlap,fiberglass,chainmail? I'm so hot! I love my gay lover "Bob" slobbing my knob. I walk to the liquor store to buy Absinthe and skunky beer. I need money for more cocaine and crack whores with no teeth.YAY gum jobs! The skankier the bitches the better! Stop by misterpats to buy cocaine and found out he's no woman. In fact he's a well equipped guy who likes wearing womens clothing under his normal bra and panties. Wow! Who knew? CULES WERE EVERYWHERE!!! Even Columbo couldn't top MrPats outfit. what a sight! POOR MIXED-UP GUY!

The next day, at work I discovered that a furry pussy cat scratched my face. It got infected and puss was oozing from my face and asshole. With gangrene imminent, I quickly call Frankie, "Come suck disgusting infectious wounds!" Licking his lips, after daisy chaining a few men, clamped down and wouldn't let go of my left earlobe so now i hear hot breath whispering "Ich dien!" wow what the fuck, your GAY!!! and smell like stale fumunda cheese. Whew I stink! I need delousing! And some douching!!! I clean my left arm pit, to no avail, it still smells. Time for lunch. Peanut butter & bologna,Myseost and Natto don't hold a candle to Surströmming! Later on, I expiscate anomalous verdigris and pass gas.

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9 years 10 months ago #551 by riada
Replied by riada on topic Three Word Story
Today, I went to fuckin work and farted profusely on my coworkers and it smelled like dead gerbils. So the coworkers decided to beat me senseless till I lost control of my bowels. I got up and felt a sharp pain in My groin area. So i screamed, "HOLY FUCKING SHIT!, call the doctor!" The doctor said, "ice your balls". I said, "why?" he said, "because, balls are swollen." I wonder how I got kicked and it hurts.

I'm driving home, balls hanging down to My knees. I pick them up, they have warts. So I'm home taking it easy, drinkin' a beer when suddenly I have no smokes and consider castration.

The next day i lick myself and find LTG kicking my ass and then licking the TV screen. I quickly dressed and headed to the closet brothel to find me a hot hooker with hairy armpits who looked like Joey Lauren Adams. After this, I went to Pathmark to buy protection from this skanky dirty meat hole. But instead I sat on my sweaty swollen balls and played with those little things. I got hungry and ate some wet dog food from the garbage from last week. It was delicious! Then I noticed my nose bleeding from to much Powdered Phororhacos Bill. I grab my big 10 inch black rubber dildo and head to The Town Square where i proceed to touch myself. Meanwhile, the 10" black rubber dildo is still lost and I'm worried it will never be recovered from the thief who stole my toy. I'm so mad! Hopefully someone will choke my chicken or perhaps will demonic do it? You never know. He's that type, that damn homo.

I look outside and its raining so i dance. Then the police stopped by to test out there new and improved cavity search program. Now my sphincter has been widened beyond repair. Now it is prolapsed. I call my pimp and say,"tighten it up!" she giggled with much enthusiasm about seeing me naked and freshly violated, causing sexual tension between us two. It was hard and i couldn't hold my bowels for much longer! My pimp stuck a cork in it, and said,"in your ass is a surprise!" Later that night, after all the canned beans were opened and eaten, I watched TV. Those Ghost Adventurers sure do SUCK! My sphincter clenching, in pain from having butt sex way to much. Should use lubricant instead of glue made for shoes! Now my pubes are glued together and it ITCHES!

The next day I woke up and forgot to remove my underwear from my sticky, smelly private parts. It was hard to peel them off my balls,but i managed to wax myself totally Brazilian style. I then discovered my left nut was mysteriously missing. Now I'm Pissed that I have only one nut. But, life goes on and I'm having an orgasm. It seems like I function fine, cause it splattered purple goo from my third eye.

So for breakfast i went to my local Hooters. The waitress suggested I cover my hairy chest with her hairy chest. What a sight! So I did. Boy did we create a scene! The local newspaper reported that we started a new spicy breakfast sandwich. It was sooo spicy even Demonic rated it X.

After breakfast I went to Walmart to buy worms. I plan on getting real kinky while fishing today. I stop home and grab my new 10" dildo, which is smaller than the fish, but it comes with a violent temper. I prep myself for anything that could possibly go wrong with the violent implement. I'm nervous that I might enjoy it less than I planned on. I drive to Rockland Psychiatric Hospital and the orderlies were chasing around a three legged dog in the cafeteria. I freak and call Misterpat while masturbating to Master Of Puppets. He said not to give chase and I'm babbling. He hangs up. Miffed I pick up an icepick and stab the worms i bought till they died. Finding that erotic, I head to the lake nearby stripping clothes as I drive slowly while singing Russian speed metal softly. Start the boat on the trailer and then it overheated really bad. Smoke billowing from everywhere! I grab my glass bong and my lighter to fix the motor McGyver style, so I got my tongue stuck in the carburetor and screamed like a little girl. Screw fishing today,I'm going bowling.

The balls are very heavy to lift without tongue properly in place. I'm going exploring with my tongue. The pin setter simply looks erotic,so i decided to deep throat a bowling pin. Then I shoved it in my lunch box so AlmostGone wouldn't be to jealous of my oral skills and ask me to drop the videos of him lost in the Pink Pussycat Theater with naked midgets, dancing around him. Then i walked to the bar,drank from boot and smelled the disgusting foot cheese I didn't clean. Then I vomited my breakfast sandwich out the window onto LithiumBaby's round,but firm mammaries. She then vomited green play dough out her nose. She bitch slapped me until comatose. Then she kicked me in the balls until i cried like an unpaid tranny prostitute. She's one bad-ass! In the meantime,Hidinginshadows is laughing at Chuck Norris while he is sucking Demonic's dick. Boy, can Chuck swallow a lot, Then he decided to reach around and grab a set of nunchucks. Lubricating them up, and inserted into my prolapsed scphinter, and it hurt! Sperm was dripping from my nose. Whatta bad day!

Time for lunch,moldy kimchee again ,which reminded me of something from that movie "Airplane". I bite into it and feel something really squishy. I look down at my lunch and see a piece of jellyfish! Seems Riada switched my lunch with some seafood special! Why would she do that to my dog food. Not sure how,or even why, she would do the old switch. Strange,but tasty, I eat the entire foot long and then grab a frosty mug of flat soda. Boy was that hitting the spot!

Now I head to the pet store and buy 2 cute gerbils, to stick them in Uno's nostrils. I think he will need some pliers to help remove them from his sore snot passages. "Puffs" wont help,damn lazy hyena! Drive to the overpriced home cheapo, and get a box of screws so i can build a cage to put the case of beer so the gerbils feel at home. Those damn drunks! Why do they stink like shit ? Once the cage is finished i took a shit. Boy I'm Smelly! Into the shower, to clean my crab infested crotch. ""Ichatta!" I scream. Hot water on my inimical nereid! I jump out of the shower, dry myself off, and my toe cheese is still flaming hot red, grab the tinactin,and inhale the viridescent Cutaneus mastocytosis. That was when I realized I had bad herpes.

On my way to the hospital, I was followed by a purple one eyed monster who's name is Crazy Blonde chick. Boy she's UGLY! The doctor said," Stop jerking off. If you don't, You will loose sensation in your dapplegray pneumatic sackbut." Terrorized of the thought of losing my livelyhood I reach into my cache of erotic rubberbands and sprinklers to only find cobwebs and moths. Rattlehead stole everything !

Off to the "toy" store with my cache to find a new tomato red flesh light. A bellicose griffin jumped in front of my car and guts splattered all over my piece of shit Yugo Hatchback speedster! A malordorous overlay to my shitty day i am having so far. I think its time to go home and sleep an hope for a nice quite night at home. Unfortunately I cant sleep without my cuddly baby blanket. Pictures of Manehawk being arrested are soothing to me, as is regicide of the hotdog. I think of him showering with me one day as I breathe slowly smoking my marlboros. He's so hot! Sal volatile, quick!

Time for bed need to rest The next day, a truculent ibex ferociously attacked me. That fat bastard! The ibex mangled my pinky finger. God damn it! Now i have no pinky finger to pick my nose with. Great horny toads! Whats a fat man going to eat without his snot-picker? Maybe some Salo? Or some mustard? Holy fucking chicken! Roasting a pigeon is the best! Need a beer so i can pick my wedding dress, burlap,fiberglass,chainmail? I'm so hot! I love my gay lover "Bob" slobbing my knob. I walk to the liquor store to buy Absinthe and skunky beer. I need money for more cocaine and crack whores with no teeth.YAY gum jobs! The skankier the bitches the better! Stop by misterpats to buy cocaine and found out he's no woman. In fact he's a well equipped guy who likes wearing womens clothing under his normal bra and panties. Wow! Who knew? CULES WERE EVERYWHERE!!! Even Columbo couldn't top MrPats outfit. what a sight! POOR MIXED-UP GUY!

The next day, at work I discovered that a furry pussy cat scratched my face. It got infected and puss was oozing from my face and asshole. With gangrene imminent, I quickly call Frankie, "Come suck disgusting infectious wounds!" Licking his lips, after daisy chaining a few men, clamped down and wouldn't let go of my left earlobe so now i hear hot breath whispering "Ich dien!" wow what the fuck, your GAY!!! and smell like stale fumunda cheese. Whew I stink! I need delousing! And some douching!!! I clean my left arm pit, to no avail, it still smells. Time for lunch. Peanut butter & bologna,Myseost and Natto don't hold a candle to Surströmming! Later on, I expiscate anomalous verdigris and pass gas. Ugh! Thats me???

Nor but in sleep findeth a cure for care.
Incertainty that once gave scope to dream
Of laughing enterprise and glory untold,
Is now a blackness that no stars redeem.

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More
9 years 10 months ago #552 by misterpat
Replied by misterpat on topic Three Word Story
Today, I went to fuckin work and farted profusely on my coworkers and it smelled like dead gerbils. So the coworkers decided to beat me senseless till I lost control of my bowels. I got up and felt a sharp pain in My groin area. So i screamed, "HOLY FUCKING SHIT!, call the doctor!" The doctor said, "ice your balls". I said, "why?" he said, "because, balls are swollen." I wonder how I got kicked and it hurts.

I'm driving home, balls hanging down to My knees. I pick them up, they have warts. So I'm home taking it easy, drinkin' a beer when suddenly I have no smokes and consider castration.

The next day i lick myself and find LTG kicking my ass and then licking the TV screen. I quickly dressed and headed to the closet brothel to find me a hot hooker with hairy armpits who looked like Joey Lauren Adams. After this, I went to Pathmark to buy protection from this skanky dirty meat hole. But instead I sat on my sweaty swollen balls and played with those little things. I got hungry and ate some wet dog food from the garbage from last week. It was delicious! Then I noticed my nose bleeding from to much Powdered Phororhacos Bill. I grab my big 10 inch black rubber dildo and head to The Town Square where i proceed to touch myself. Meanwhile, the 10" black rubber dildo is still lost and I'm worried it will never be recovered from the thief who stole my toy. I'm so mad! Hopefully someone will choke my chicken or perhaps will demonic do it? You never know. He's that type, that damn homo.

I look outside and its raining so i dance. Then the police stopped by to test out there new and improved cavity search program. Now my sphincter has been widened beyond repair. Now it is prolapsed. I call my pimp and say,"tighten it up!" she giggled with much enthusiasm about seeing me naked and freshly violated, causing sexual tension between us two. It was hard and i couldn't hold my bowels for much longer! My pimp stuck a cork in it, and said,"in your ass is a surprise!" Later that night, after all the canned beans were opened and eaten, I watched TV. Those Ghost Adventurers sure do SUCK! My sphincter clenching, in pain from having butt sex way to much. Should use lubricant instead of glue made for shoes! Now my pubes are glued together and it ITCHES!

The next day I woke up and forgot to remove my underwear from my sticky, smelly private parts. It was hard to peel them off my balls,but i managed to wax myself totally Brazilian style. I then discovered my left nut was mysteriously missing. Now I'm Pissed that I have only one nut. But, life goes on and I'm having an orgasm. It seems like I function fine, cause it splattered purple goo from my third eye.

So for breakfast i went to my local Hooters. The waitress suggested I cover my hairy chest with her hairy chest. What a sight! So I did. Boy did we create a scene! The local newspaper reported that we started a new spicy breakfast sandwich. It was sooo spicy even Demonic rated it X.

After breakfast I went to Walmart to buy worms. I plan on getting real kinky while fishing today. I stop home and grab my new 10" dildo, which is smaller than the fish, but it comes with a violent temper. I prep myself for anything that could possibly go wrong with the violent implement. I'm nervous that I might enjoy it less than I planned on. I drive to Rockland Psychiatric Hospital and the orderlies were chasing around a three legged dog in the cafeteria. I freak and call Misterpat while masturbating to Master Of Puppets. He said not to give chase and I'm babbling. He hangs up. Miffed I pick up an icepick and stab the worms i bought till they died. Finding that erotic, I head to the lake nearby stripping clothes as I drive slowly while singing Russian speed metal softly. Start the boat on the trailer and then it overheated really bad. Smoke billowing from everywhere! I grab my glass bong and my lighter to fix the motor McGyver style, so I got my tongue stuck in the carburetor and screamed like a little girl. Screw fishing today,I'm going bowling.

The balls are very heavy to lift without tongue properly in place. I'm going exploring with my tongue. The pin setter simply looks erotic,so i decided to deep throat a bowling pin. Then I shoved it in my lunch box so AlmostGone wouldn't be to jealous of my oral skills and ask me to drop the videos of him lost in the Pink Pussycat Theater with naked midgets, dancing around him. Then i walked to the bar,drank from boot and smelled the disgusting foot cheese I didn't clean. Then I vomited my breakfast sandwich out the window onto LithiumBaby's round,but firm mammaries. She then vomited green play dough out her nose. She bitch slapped me until comatose. Then she kicked me in the balls until i cried like an unpaid tranny prostitute. She's one bad-ass! In the meantime,Hidinginshadows is laughing at Chuck Norris while he is sucking Demonic's dick. Boy, can Chuck swallow a lot, Then he decided to reach around and grab a set of nunchucks. Lubricating them up, and inserted into my prolapsed scphinter, and it hurt! Sperm was dripping from my nose. Whatta bad day!

Time for lunch,moldy kimchee again ,which reminded me of something from that movie "Airplane". I bite into it and feel something really squishy. I look down at my lunch and see a piece of jellyfish! Seems Riada switched my lunch with some seafood special! Why would she do that to my dog food. Not sure how,or even why, she would do the old switch. Strange,but tasty, I eat the entire foot long and then grab a frosty mug of flat soda. Boy was that hitting the spot!

Now I head to the pet store and buy 2 cute gerbils, to stick them in Uno's nostrils. I think he will need some pliers to help remove them from his sore snot passages. "Puffs" wont help,damn lazy hyena! Drive to the overpriced home cheapo, and get a box of screws so i can build a cage to put the case of beer so the gerbils feel at home. Those damn drunks! Why do they stink like shit ? Once the cage is finished i took a shit. Boy I'm Smelly! Into the shower, to clean my crab infested crotch. ""Ichatta!" I scream. Hot water on my inimical nereid! I jump out of the shower, dry myself off, and my toe cheese is still flaming hot red, grab the tinactin,and inhale the viridescent Cutaneus mastocytosis. That was when I realized I had bad herpes.

On my way to the hospital, I was followed by a purple one eyed monster who's name is Crazy Blonde chick. Boy she's UGLY! The doctor said," Stop jerking off. If you don't, You will loose sensation in your dapplegray pneumatic sackbut." Terrorized of the thought of losing my livelyhood I reach into my cache of erotic rubberbands and sprinklers to only find cobwebs and moths. Rattlehead stole everything !

Off to the "toy" store with my cache to find a new tomato red flesh light. A bellicose griffin jumped in front of my car and guts splattered all over my piece of shit Yugo Hatchback speedster! A malordorous overlay to my shitty day i am having so far. I think its time to go home and sleep an hope for a nice quite night at home. Unfortunately I cant sleep without my cuddly baby blanket. Pictures of Manehawk being arrested are soothing to me, as is regicide of the hotdog. I think of him showering with me one day as I breathe slowly smoking my marlboros. He's so hot! Sal volatile, quick!

Time for bed need to rest The next day, a truculent ibex ferociously attacked me. That fat bastard! The ibex mangled my pinky finger. God damn it! Now i have no pinky finger to pick my nose with. Great horny toads! Whats a fat man going to eat without his snot-picker? Maybe some Salo? Or some mustard? Holy fucking chicken! Roasting a pigeon is the best! Need a beer so i can pick my wedding dress, burlap,fiberglass,chainmail? I'm so hot! I love my gay lover "Bob" slobbing my knob. I walk to the liquor store to buy Absinthe and skunky beer. I need money for more cocaine and crack whores with no teeth.YAY gum jobs! The skankier the bitches the better! Stop by misterpats to buy cocaine and found out he's no woman. In fact he's a well equipped guy who likes wearing womens clothing under his normal bra and panties. Wow! Who knew? CULES WERE EVERYWHERE!!! Even Columbo couldn't top MrPats outfit. what a sight! POOR MIXED-UP GUY!

The next day, at work I discovered that a furry pussy cat scratched my face. It got infected and puss was oozing from my face and asshole. With gangrene imminent, I quickly call Frankie, "Come suck disgusting infectious wounds!" Licking his lips, after daisy chaining a few men, clamped down and wouldn't let go of my left earlobe so now i hear hot breath whispering "Ich dien!" wow what the fuck, your GAY!!! and smell like stale fumunda cheese. Whew I stink! I need delousing! And some douching!!! I clean my left arm pit, to no avail, it still smells. Time for lunch. Peanut butter & bologna,Myseost and Natto don't hold a candle to Surströmming! Later on, I expiscate anomalous verdigris and pass gas. Ugh! Thats me??? I'm worse than

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9 years 10 months ago #553 by riada
Replied by riada on topic Three Word Story
Today, I went to fuckin work and farted profusely on my coworkers and it smelled like dead gerbils. So the coworkers decided to beat me senseless till I lost control of my bowels. I got up and felt a sharp pain in My groin area. So i screamed, "HOLY FUCKING SHIT!, call the doctor!" The doctor said, "ice your balls". I said, "why?" he said, "because, balls are swollen." I wonder how I got kicked and it hurts.

I'm driving home, balls hanging down to My knees. I pick them up, they have warts. So I'm home taking it easy, drinkin' a beer when suddenly I have no smokes and consider castration.

The next day i lick myself and find LTG kicking my ass and then licking the TV screen. I quickly dressed and headed to the closet brothel to find me a hot hooker with hairy armpits who looked like Joey Lauren Adams. After this, I went to Pathmark to buy protection from this skanky dirty meat hole. But instead I sat on my sweaty swollen balls and played with those little things. I got hungry and ate some wet dog food from the garbage from last week. It was delicious! Then I noticed my nose bleeding from to much Powdered Phororhacos Bill. I grab my big 10 inch black rubber dildo and head to The Town Square where i proceed to touch myself. Meanwhile, the 10" black rubber dildo is still lost and I'm worried it will never be recovered from the thief who stole my toy. I'm so mad! Hopefully someone will choke my chicken or perhaps will demonic do it? You never know. He's that type, that damn homo.

I look outside and its raining so i dance. Then the police stopped by to test out there new and improved cavity search program. Now my sphincter has been widened beyond repair. Now it is prolapsed. I call my pimp and say,"tighten it up!" she giggled with much enthusiasm about seeing me naked and freshly violated, causing sexual tension between us two. It was hard and i couldn't hold my bowels for much longer! My pimp stuck a cork in it, and said,"in your ass is a surprise!" Later that night, after all the canned beans were opened and eaten, I watched TV. Those Ghost Adventurers sure do SUCK! My sphincter clenching, in pain from having butt sex way to much. Should use lubricant instead of glue made for shoes! Now my pubes are glued together and it ITCHES!

The next day I woke up and forgot to remove my underwear from my sticky, smelly private parts. It was hard to peel them off my balls,but i managed to wax myself totally Brazilian style. I then discovered my left nut was mysteriously missing. Now I'm Pissed that I have only one nut. But, life goes on and I'm having an orgasm. It seems like I function fine, cause it splattered purple goo from my third eye.

So for breakfast i went to my local Hooters. The waitress suggested I cover my hairy chest with her hairy chest. What a sight! So I did. Boy did we create a scene! The local newspaper reported that we started a new spicy breakfast sandwich. It was sooo spicy even Demonic rated it X.

After breakfast I went to Walmart to buy worms. I plan on getting real kinky while fishing today. I stop home and grab my new 10" dildo, which is smaller than the fish, but it comes with a violent temper. I prep myself for anything that could possibly go wrong with the violent implement. I'm nervous that I might enjoy it less than I planned on. I drive to Rockland Psychiatric Hospital and the orderlies were chasing around a three legged dog in the cafeteria. I freak and call Misterpat while masturbating to Master Of Puppets. He said not to give chase and I'm babbling. He hangs up. Miffed I pick up an icepick and stab the worms i bought till they died. Finding that erotic, I head to the lake nearby stripping clothes as I drive slowly while singing Russian speed metal softly. Start the boat on the trailer and then it overheated really bad. Smoke billowing from everywhere! I grab my glass bong and my lighter to fix the motor McGyver style, so I got my tongue stuck in the carburetor and screamed like a little girl. Screw fishing today,I'm going bowling.

The balls are very heavy to lift without tongue properly in place. I'm going exploring with my tongue. The pin setter simply looks erotic,so i decided to deep throat a bowling pin. Then I shoved it in my lunch box so AlmostGone wouldn't be to jealous of my oral skills and ask me to drop the videos of him lost in the Pink Pussycat Theater with naked midgets, dancing around him. Then i walked to the bar,drank from boot and smelled the disgusting foot cheese I didn't clean. Then I vomited my breakfast sandwich out the window onto LithiumBaby's round,but firm mammaries. She then vomited green play dough out her nose. She bitch slapped me until comatose. Then she kicked me in the balls until i cried like an unpaid tranny prostitute. She's one bad-ass! In the meantime,Hidinginshadows is laughing at Chuck Norris while he is sucking Demonic's dick. Boy, can Chuck swallow a lot, Then he decided to reach around and grab a set of nunchucks. Lubricating them up, and inserted into my prolapsed scphinter, and it hurt! Sperm was dripping from my nose. Whatta bad day!

Time for lunch,moldy kimchee again ,which reminded me of something from that movie "Airplane". I bite into it and feel something really squishy. I look down at my lunch and see a piece of jellyfish! Seems Riada switched my lunch with some seafood special! Why would she do that to my dog food. Not sure how,or even why, she would do the old switch. Strange,but tasty, I eat the entire foot long and then grab a frosty mug of flat soda. Boy was that hitting the spot!

Now I head to the pet store and buy 2 cute gerbils, to stick them in Uno's nostrils. I think he will need some pliers to help remove them from his sore snot passages. "Puffs" wont help,damn lazy hyena! Drive to the overpriced home cheapo, and get a box of screws so i can build a cage to put the case of beer so the gerbils feel at home. Those damn drunks! Why do they stink like shit ? Once the cage is finished i took a shit. Boy I'm Smelly! Into the shower, to clean my crab infested crotch. ""Ichatta!" I scream. Hot water on my inimical nereid! I jump out of the shower, dry myself off, and my toe cheese is still flaming hot red, grab the tinactin,and inhale the viridescent Cutaneus mastocytosis. That was when I realized I had bad herpes.

On my way to the hospital, I was followed by a purple one eyed monster who's name is Crazy Blonde chick. Boy she's UGLY! The doctor said," Stop jerking off. If you don't, You will loose sensation in your dapplegray pneumatic sackbut." Terrorized of the thought of losing my livelyhood I reach into my cache of erotic rubberbands and sprinklers to only find cobwebs and moths. Rattlehead stole everything !

Off to the "toy" store with my cache to find a new tomato red flesh light. A bellicose griffin jumped in front of my car and guts splattered all over my piece of shit Yugo Hatchback speedster! A malordorous overlay to my shitty day i am having so far. I think its time to go home and sleep an hope for a nice quite night at home. Unfortunately I cant sleep without my cuddly baby blanket. Pictures of Manehawk being arrested are soothing to me, as is regicide of the hotdog. I think of him showering with me one day as I breathe slowly smoking my marlboros. He's so hot! Sal volatile, quick!

Time for bed need to rest The next day, a truculent ibex ferociously attacked me. That fat bastard! The ibex mangled my pinky finger. God damn it! Now i have no pinky finger to pick my nose with. Great horny toads! Whats a fat man going to eat without his snot-picker? Maybe some Salo? Or some mustard? Holy fucking chicken! Roasting a pigeon is the best! Need a beer so i can pick my wedding dress, burlap,fiberglass,chainmail? I'm so hot! I love my gay lover "Bob" slobbing my knob. I walk to the liquor store to buy Absinthe and skunky beer. I need money for more cocaine and crack whores with no teeth.YAY gum jobs! The skankier the bitches the better! Stop by misterpats to buy cocaine and found out he's no woman. In fact he's a well equipped guy who likes wearing womens clothing under his normal bra and panties. Wow! Who knew? CULES WERE EVERYWHERE!!! Even Columbo couldn't top MrPats outfit. what a sight! POOR MIXED-UP GUY!

The next day, at work I discovered that a furry pussy cat scratched my face. It got infected and puss was oozing from my face and asshole. With gangrene imminent, I quickly call Frankie, "Come suck disgusting infectious wounds!" Licking his lips, after daisy chaining a few men, clamped down and wouldn't let go of my left earlobe so now i hear hot breath whispering "Ich dien!" wow what the fuck, your GAY!!! and smell like stale fumunda cheese. Whew I stink! I need delousing! And some douching!!! I clean my left arm pit, to no avail, it still smells. Time for lunch. Peanut butter & bologna,Myseost and Natto don't hold a candle to Surströmming! Later on, I expiscate anomalous verdigris and pass gas. Ugh! Thats me??? I'm worse than moldy rotten tofu

Nor but in sleep findeth a cure for care.
Incertainty that once gave scope to dream
Of laughing enterprise and glory untold,
Is now a blackness that no stars redeem.

Please Log in or Create an account to join the conversation.

More
9 years 10 months ago #554 by misterpat
Replied by misterpat on topic Three Word Story
Today, I went to fuckin work and farted profusely on my coworkers and it smelled like dead gerbils. So the coworkers decided to beat me senseless till I lost control of my bowels. I got up and felt a sharp pain in My groin area. So i screamed, "HOLY FUCKING SHIT!, call the doctor!" The doctor said, "ice your balls". I said, "why?" he said, "because, balls are swollen." I wonder how I got kicked and it hurts.

I'm driving home, balls hanging down to My knees. I pick them up, they have warts. So I'm home taking it easy, drinkin' a beer when suddenly I have no smokes and consider castration.

The next day i lick myself and find LTG kicking my ass and then licking the TV screen. I quickly dressed and headed to the closet brothel to find me a hot hooker with hairy armpits who looked like Joey Lauren Adams. After this, I went to Pathmark to buy protection from this skanky dirty meat hole. But instead I sat on my sweaty swollen balls and played with those little things. I got hungry and ate some wet dog food from the garbage from last week. It was delicious! Then I noticed my nose bleeding from to much Powdered Phororhacos Bill. I grab my big 10 inch black rubber dildo and head to The Town Square where i proceed to touch myself. Meanwhile, the 10" black rubber dildo is still lost and I'm worried it will never be recovered from the thief who stole my toy. I'm so mad! Hopefully someone will choke my chicken or perhaps will demonic do it? You never know. He's that type, that damn homo.

I look outside and its raining so i dance. Then the police stopped by to test out there new and improved cavity search program. Now my sphincter has been widened beyond repair. Now it is prolapsed. I call my pimp and say,"tighten it up!" she giggled with much enthusiasm about seeing me naked and freshly violated, causing sexual tension between us two. It was hard and i couldn't hold my bowels for much longer! My pimp stuck a cork in it, and said,"in your ass is a surprise!" Later that night, after all the canned beans were opened and eaten, I watched TV. Those Ghost Adventurers sure do SUCK! My sphincter clenching, in pain from having butt sex way to much. Should use lubricant instead of glue made for shoes! Now my pubes are glued together and it ITCHES!

The next day I woke up and forgot to remove my underwear from my sticky, smelly private parts. It was hard to peel them off my balls,but i managed to wax myself totally Brazilian style. I then discovered my left nut was mysteriously missing. Now I'm Pissed that I have only one nut. But, life goes on and I'm having an orgasm. It seems like I function fine, cause it splattered purple goo from my third eye.

So for breakfast i went to my local Hooters. The waitress suggested I cover my hairy chest with her hairy chest. What a sight! So I did. Boy did we create a scene! The local newspaper reported that we started a new spicy breakfast sandwich. It was sooo spicy even Demonic rated it X.

After breakfast I went to Walmart to buy worms. I plan on getting real kinky while fishing today. I stop home and grab my new 10" dildo, which is smaller than the fish, but it comes with a violent temper. I prep myself for anything that could possibly go wrong with the violent implement. I'm nervous that I might enjoy it less than I planned on. I drive to Rockland Psychiatric Hospital and the orderlies were chasing around a three legged dog in the cafeteria. I freak and call Misterpat while masturbating to Master Of Puppets. He said not to give chase and I'm babbling. He hangs up. Miffed I pick up an icepick and stab the worms i bought till they died. Finding that erotic, I head to the lake nearby stripping clothes as I drive slowly while singing Russian speed metal softly. Start the boat on the trailer and then it overheated really bad. Smoke billowing from everywhere! I grab my glass bong and my lighter to fix the motor McGyver style, so I got my tongue stuck in the carburetor and screamed like a little girl. Screw fishing today,I'm going bowling.

The balls are very heavy to lift without tongue properly in place. I'm going exploring with my tongue. The pin setter simply looks erotic,so i decided to deep throat a bowling pin. Then I shoved it in my lunch box so AlmostGone wouldn't be to jealous of my oral skills and ask me to drop the videos of him lost in the Pink Pussycat Theater with naked midgets, dancing around him. Then i walked to the bar,drank from boot and smelled the disgusting foot cheese I didn't clean. Then I vomited my breakfast sandwich out the window onto LithiumBaby's round,but firm mammaries. She then vomited green play dough out her nose. She bitch slapped me until comatose. Then she kicked me in the balls until i cried like an unpaid tranny prostitute. She's one bad-ass! In the meantime,Hidinginshadows is laughing at Chuck Norris while he is sucking Demonic's dick. Boy, can Chuck swallow a lot, Then he decided to reach around and grab a set of nunchucks. Lubricating them up, and inserted into my prolapsed scphinter, and it hurt! Sperm was dripping from my nose. Whatta bad day!

Time for lunch,moldy kimchee again ,which reminded me of something from that movie "Airplane". I bite into it and feel something really squishy. I look down at my lunch and see a piece of jellyfish! Seems Riada switched my lunch with some seafood special! Why would she do that to my dog food. Not sure how,or even why, she would do the old switch. Strange,but tasty, I eat the entire foot long and then grab a frosty mug of flat soda. Boy was that hitting the spot!

Now I head to the pet store and buy 2 cute gerbils, to stick them in Uno's nostrils. I think he will need some pliers to help remove them from his sore snot passages. "Puffs" wont help,damn lazy hyena! Drive to the overpriced home cheapo, and get a box of screws so i can build a cage to put the case of beer so the gerbils feel at home. Those damn drunks! Why do they stink like shit ? Once the cage is finished i took a shit. Boy I'm Smelly! Into the shower, to clean my crab infested crotch. ""Ichatta!" I scream. Hot water on my inimical nereid! I jump out of the shower, dry myself off, and my toe cheese is still flaming hot red, grab the tinactin,and inhale the viridescent Cutaneus mastocytosis. That was when I realized I had bad herpes.

On my way to the hospital, I was followed by a purple one eyed monster who's name is Crazy Blonde chick. Boy she's UGLY! The doctor said," Stop jerking off. If you don't, You will loose sensation in your dapplegray pneumatic sackbut." Terrorized of the thought of losing my livelyhood I reach into my cache of erotic rubberbands and sprinklers to only find cobwebs and moths. Rattlehead stole everything !

Off to the "toy" store with my cache to find a new tomato red flesh light. A bellicose griffin jumped in front of my car and guts splattered all over my piece of shit Yugo Hatchback speedster! A malordorous overlay to my shitty day i am having so far. I think its time to go home and sleep an hope for a nice quite night at home. Unfortunately I cant sleep without my cuddly baby blanket. Pictures of Manehawk being arrested are soothing to me, as is regicide of the hotdog. I think of him showering with me one day as I breathe slowly smoking my marlboros. He's so hot! Sal volatile, quick!

Time for bed need to rest The next day, a truculent ibex ferociously attacked me. That fat bastard! The ibex mangled my pinky finger. God damn it! Now i have no pinky finger to pick my nose with. Great horny toads! Whats a fat man going to eat without his snot-picker? Maybe some Salo? Or some mustard? Holy fucking chicken! Roasting a pigeon is the best! Need a beer so i can pick my wedding dress, burlap,fiberglass,chainmail? I'm so hot! I love my gay lover "Bob" slobbing my knob. I walk to the liquor store to buy Absinthe and skunky beer. I need money for more cocaine and crack whores with no teeth.YAY gum jobs! The skankier the bitches the better! Stop by misterpats to buy cocaine and found out he's no woman. In fact he's a well equipped guy who likes wearing womens clothing under his normal bra and panties. Wow! Who knew? CULES WERE EVERYWHERE!!! Even Columbo couldn't top MrPats outfit. what a sight! POOR MIXED-UP GUY!

The next day, at work I discovered that a furry pussy cat scratched my face. It got infected and puss was oozing from my face and asshole. With gangrene imminent, I quickly call Frankie, "Come suck disgusting infectious wounds!" Licking his lips, after daisy chaining a few men, clamped down and wouldn't let go of my left earlobe so now i hear hot breath whispering "Ich dien!" wow what the fuck, your GAY!!! and smell like stale fumunda cheese. Whew I stink! I need delousing! And some douching!!! I clean my left arm pit, to no avail, it still smells. Time for lunch. Peanut butter & bologna,Myseost and Natto don't hold a candle to Surströmming! Later on, I expiscate anomalous verdigris and pass gas. Ugh! Thats me??? I'm worse than moldy rotten tofu! I need a

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9 years 10 months ago #555 by lithiumbaby
Replied by lithiumbaby on topic Three Word Story
Today, I went to fuckin work and farted profusely on my coworkers and it smelled like dead gerbils. So the coworkers decided to beat me senseless till I lost control of my bowels. I got up and felt a sharp pain in My groin area. So i screamed, "HOLY FUCKING SHIT!, call the doctor!" The doctor said, "ice your balls". I said, "why?" he said, "because, balls are swollen." I wonder how I got kicked and it hurts.

I'm driving home, balls hanging down to My knees. I pick them up, they have warts. So I'm home taking it easy, drinkin' a beer when suddenly I have no smokes and consider castration.

The next day i lick myself and find LTG kicking my ass and then licking the TV screen. I quickly dressed and headed to the closet brothel to find me a hot hooker with hairy armpits who looked like Joey Lauren Adams. After this, I went to Pathmark to buy protection from this skanky dirty meat hole. But instead I sat on my sweaty swollen balls and played with those little things. I got hungry and ate some wet dog food from the garbage from last week. It was delicious! Then I noticed my nose bleeding from to much Powdered Phororhacos Bill. I grab my big 10 inch black rubber dildo and head to The Town Square where i proceed to touch myself. Meanwhile, the 10" black rubber dildo is still lost and I'm worried it will never be recovered from the thief who stole my toy. I'm so mad! Hopefully someone will choke my chicken or perhaps will demonic do it? You never know. He's that type, that damn homo.

I look outside and its raining so i dance. Then the police stopped by to test out there new and improved cavity search program. Now my sphincter has been widened beyond repair. Now it is prolapsed. I call my pimp and say,"tighten it up!" she giggled with much enthusiasm about seeing me naked and freshly violated, causing sexual tension between us two. It was hard and i couldn't hold my bowels for much longer! My pimp stuck a cork in it, and said,"in your ass is a surprise!" Later that night, after all the canned beans were opened and eaten, I watched TV. Those Ghost Adventurers sure do SUCK! My sphincter clenching, in pain from having butt sex way to much. Should use lubricant instead of glue made for shoes! Now my pubes are glued together and it ITCHES!

The next day I woke up and forgot to remove my underwear from my sticky, smelly private parts. It was hard to peel them off my balls,but i managed to wax myself totally Brazilian style. I then discovered my left nut was mysteriously missing. Now I'm Pissed that I have only one nut. But, life goes on and I'm having an orgasm. It seems like I function fine, cause it splattered purple goo from my third eye.

So for breakfast i went to my local Hooters. The waitress suggested I cover my hairy chest with her hairy chest. What a sight! So I did. Boy did we create a scene! The local newspaper reported that we started a new spicy breakfast sandwich. It was sooo spicy even Demonic rated it X.

After breakfast I went to Walmart to buy worms. I plan on getting real kinky while fishing today. I stop home and grab my new 10" dildo, which is smaller than the fish, but it comes with a violent temper. I prep myself for anything that could possibly go wrong with the violent implement. I'm nervous that I might enjoy it less than I planned on. I drive to Rockland Psychiatric Hospital and the orderlies were chasing around a three legged dog in the cafeteria. I freak and call Misterpat while masturbating to Master Of Puppets. He said not to give chase and I'm babbling. He hangs up. Miffed I pick up an icepick and stab the worms i bought till they died. Finding that erotic, I head to the lake nearby stripping clothes as I drive slowly while singing Russian speed metal softly. Start the boat on the trailer and then it overheated really bad. Smoke billowing from everywhere! I grab my glass bong and my lighter to fix the motor McGyver style, so I got my tongue stuck in the carburetor and screamed like a little girl. Screw fishing today,I'm going bowling.

The balls are very heavy to lift without tongue properly in place. I'm going exploring with my tongue. The pin setter simply looks erotic,so i decided to deep throat a bowling pin. Then I shoved it in my lunch box so AlmostGone wouldn't be to jealous of my oral skills and ask me to drop the videos of him lost in the Pink Pussycat Theater with naked midgets, dancing around him. Then i walked to the bar,drank from boot and smelled the disgusting foot cheese I didn't clean. Then I vomited my breakfast sandwich out the window onto LithiumBaby's round,but firm mammaries. She then vomited green play dough out her nose. She bitch slapped me until comatose. Then she kicked me in the balls until i cried like an unpaid tranny prostitute. She's one bad-ass! In the meantime,Hidinginshadows is laughing at Chuck Norris while he is sucking Demonic's dick. Boy, can Chuck swallow a lot, Then he decided to reach around and grab a set of nunchucks. Lubricating them up, and inserted into my prolapsed scphinter, and it hurt! Sperm was dripping from my nose. Whatta bad day!

Time for lunch,moldy kimchee again ,which reminded me of something from that movie "Airplane". I bite into it and feel something really squishy. I look down at my lunch and see a piece of jellyfish! Seems Riada switched my lunch with some seafood special! Why would she do that to my dog food. Not sure how,or even why, she would do the old switch. Strange,but tasty, I eat the entire foot long and then grab a frosty mug of flat soda. Boy was that hitting the spot!

Now I head to the pet store and buy 2 cute gerbils, to stick them in Uno's nostrils. I think he will need some pliers to help remove them from his sore snot passages. "Puffs" wont help,damn lazy hyena! Drive to the overpriced home cheapo, and get a box of screws so i can build a cage to put the case of beer so the gerbils feel at home. Those damn drunks! Why do they stink like shit ? Once the cage is finished i took a shit. Boy I'm Smelly! Into the shower, to clean my crab infested crotch. ""Ichatta!" I scream. Hot water on my inimical nereid! I jump out of the shower, dry myself off, and my toe cheese is still flaming hot red, grab the tinactin,and inhale the viridescent Cutaneus mastocytosis. That was when I realized I had bad herpes.

On my way to the hospital, I was followed by a purple one eyed monster who's name is Crazy Blonde chick. Boy she's UGLY! The doctor said," Stop jerking off. If you don't, You will loose sensation in your dapplegray pneumatic sackbut." Terrorized of the thought of losing my livelyhood I reach into my cache of erotic rubberbands and sprinklers to only find cobwebs and moths. Rattlehead stole everything !

Off to the "toy" store with my cache to find a new tomato red flesh light. A bellicose griffin jumped in front of my car and guts splattered all over my piece of shit Yugo Hatchback speedster! A malordorous overlay to my shitty day i am having so far. I think its time to go home and sleep an hope for a nice quite night at home. Unfortunately I cant sleep without my cuddly baby blanket. Pictures of Manehawk being arrested are soothing to me, as is regicide of the hotdog. I think of him showering with me one day as I breathe slowly smoking my marlboros. He's so hot! Sal volatile, quick!

Time for bed need to rest The next day, a truculent ibex ferociously attacked me. That fat bastard! The ibex mangled my pinky finger. God damn it! Now i have no pinky finger to pick my nose with. Great horny toads! Whats a fat man going to eat without his snot-picker? Maybe some Salo? Or some mustard? Holy fucking chicken! Roasting a pigeon is the best! Need a beer so i can pick my wedding dress, burlap,fiberglass,chainmail? I'm so hot! I love my gay lover "Bob" slobbing my knob. I walk to the liquor store to buy Absinthe and skunky beer. I need money for more cocaine and crack whores with no teeth.YAY gum jobs! The skankier the bitches the better! Stop by misterpats to buy cocaine and found out he's no woman. In fact he's a well equipped guy who likes wearing womens clothing under his normal bra and panties. Wow! Who knew? CULES WERE EVERYWHERE!!! Even Columbo couldn't top MrPats outfit. what a sight! POOR MIXED-UP GUY!

The next day, at work I discovered that a furry pussy cat scratched my face. It got infected and puss was oozing from my face and asshole. With gangrene imminent, I quickly call Frankie, "Come suck disgusting infectious wounds!" Licking his lips, after daisy chaining a few men, clamped down and wouldn't let go of my left earlobe so now i hear hot breath whispering "Ich dien!" wow what the fuck, your GAY!!! and smell like stale fumunda cheese. Whew I stink! I need delousing! And some douching!!! I clean my left arm pit, to no avail, it still smells. Time for lunch. Peanut butter & bologna,Myseost and Natto don't hold a candle to Surströmming! Later on, I expiscate anomalous verdigris and pass gas. Ugh! Thats me??? I'm worse than moldy rotten tofu! I need a disinfectant chemical bath

BLAH BLAH BLAH

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9 years 9 months ago #556 by misterpat
Replied by misterpat on topic Three Word Story
Today, I went to fuckin work and farted profusely on my coworkers and it smelled like dead gerbils. So the coworkers decided to beat me senseless till I lost control of my bowels. I got up and felt a sharp pain in My groin area. So i screamed, "HOLY FUCKING SHIT!, call the doctor!" The doctor said, "ice your balls". I said, "why?" he said, "because, balls are swollen." I wonder how I got kicked and it hurts.

I'm driving home, balls hanging down to My knees. I pick them up, they have warts. So I'm home taking it easy, drinkin' a beer when suddenly I have no smokes and consider castration.

The next day i lick myself and find LTG kicking my ass and then licking the TV screen. I quickly dressed and headed to the closet brothel to find me a hot hooker with hairy armpits who looked like Joey Lauren Adams. After this, I went to Pathmark to buy protection from this skanky dirty meat hole. But instead I sat on my sweaty swollen balls and played with those little things. I got hungry and ate some wet dog food from the garbage from last week. It was delicious! Then I noticed my nose bleeding from to much Powdered Phororhacos Bill. I grab my big 10 inch black rubber dildo and head to The Town Square where i proceed to touch myself. Meanwhile, the 10" black rubber dildo is still lost and I'm worried it will never be recovered from the thief who stole my toy. I'm so mad! Hopefully someone will choke my chicken or perhaps will demonic do it? You never know. He's that type, that damn homo.

I look outside and its raining so i dance. Then the police stopped by to test out there new and improved cavity search program. Now my sphincter has been widened beyond repair. Now it is prolapsed. I call my pimp and say,"tighten it up!" she giggled with much enthusiasm about seeing me naked and freshly violated, causing sexual tension between us two. It was hard and i couldn't hold my bowels for much longer! My pimp stuck a cork in it, and said,"in your ass is a surprise!" Later that night, after all the canned beans were opened and eaten, I watched TV. Those Ghost Adventurers sure do SUCK! My sphincter clenching, in pain from having butt sex way to much. Should use lubricant instead of glue made for shoes! Now my pubes are glued together and it ITCHES!

The next day I woke up and forgot to remove my underwear from my sticky, smelly private parts. It was hard to peel them off my balls,but i managed to wax myself totally Brazilian style. I then discovered my left nut was mysteriously missing. Now I'm Pissed that I have only one nut. But, life goes on and I'm having an orgasm. It seems like I function fine, cause it splattered purple goo from my third eye.

So for breakfast i went to my local Hooters. The waitress suggested I cover my hairy chest with her hairy chest. What a sight! So I did. Boy did we create a scene! The local newspaper reported that we started a new spicy breakfast sandwich. It was sooo spicy even Demonic rated it X.

After breakfast I went to Walmart to buy worms. I plan on getting real kinky while fishing today. I stop home and grab my new 10" dildo, which is smaller than the fish, but it comes with a violent temper. I prep myself for anything that could possibly go wrong with the violent implement. I'm nervous that I might enjoy it less than I planned on. I drive to Rockland Psychiatric Hospital and the orderlies were chasing around a three legged dog in the cafeteria. I freak and call Misterpat while masturbating to Master Of Puppets. He said not to give chase and I'm babbling. He hangs up. Miffed I pick up an icepick and stab the worms i bought till they died. Finding that erotic, I head to the lake nearby stripping clothes as I drive slowly while singing Russian speed metal softly. Start the boat on the trailer and then it overheated really bad. Smoke billowing from everywhere! I grab my glass bong and my lighter to fix the motor McGyver style, so I got my tongue stuck in the carburetor and screamed like a little girl. Screw fishing today,I'm going bowling.

The balls are very heavy to lift without tongue properly in place. I'm going exploring with my tongue. The pin setter simply looks erotic,so i decided to deep throat a bowling pin. Then I shoved it in my lunch box so AlmostGone wouldn't be to jealous of my oral skills and ask me to drop the videos of him lost in the Pink Pussycat Theater with naked midgets, dancing around him. Then i walked to the bar,drank from boot and smelled the disgusting foot cheese I didn't clean. Then I vomited my breakfast sandwich out the window onto LithiumBaby's round,but firm mammaries. She then vomited green play dough out her nose. She bitch slapped me until comatose. Then she kicked me in the balls until i cried like an unpaid tranny prostitute. She's one bad-ass! In the meantime,Hidinginshadows is laughing at Chuck Norris while he is sucking Demonic's dick. Boy, can Chuck swallow a lot, Then he decided to reach around and grab a set of nunchucks. Lubricating them up, and inserted into my prolapsed scphinter, and it hurt! Sperm was dripping from my nose. Whatta bad day!

Time for lunch,moldy kimchee again ,which reminded me of something from that movie "Airplane". I bite into it and feel something really squishy. I look down at my lunch and see a piece of jellyfish! Seems Riada switched my lunch with some seafood special! Why would she do that to my dog food. Not sure how,or even why, she would do the old switch. Strange,but tasty, I eat the entire foot long and then grab a frosty mug of flat soda. Boy was that hitting the spot!

Now I head to the pet store and buy 2 cute gerbils, to stick them in Uno's nostrils. I think he will need some pliers to help remove them from his sore snot passages. "Puffs" wont help,damn lazy hyena! Drive to the overpriced home cheapo, and get a box of screws so i can build a cage to put the case of beer so the gerbils feel at home. Those damn drunks! Why do they stink like shit ? Once the cage is finished i took a shit. Boy I'm Smelly! Into the shower, to clean my crab infested crotch. ""Ichatta!" I scream. Hot water on my inimical nereid! I jump out of the shower, dry myself off, and my toe cheese is still flaming hot red, grab the tinactin,and inhale the viridescent Cutaneus mastocytosis. That was when I realized I had bad herpes.

On my way to the hospital, I was followed by a purple one eyed monster who's name is Crazy Blonde chick. Boy she's UGLY! The doctor said," Stop jerking off. If you don't, You will loose sensation in your dapplegray pneumatic sackbut." Terrorized of the thought of losing my livelyhood I reach into my cache of erotic rubberbands and sprinklers to only find cobwebs and moths. Rattlehead stole everything !

Off to the "toy" store with my cache to find a new tomato red flesh light. A bellicose griffin jumped in front of my car and guts splattered all over my piece of shit Yugo Hatchback speedster! A malordorous overlay to my shitty day i am having so far. I think its time to go home and sleep an hope for a nice quite night at home. Unfortunately I cant sleep without my cuddly baby blanket. Pictures of Manehawk being arrested are soothing to me, as is regicide of the hotdog. I think of him showering with me one day as I breathe slowly smoking my marlboros. He's so hot! Sal volatile, quick!

Time for bed need to rest The next day, a truculent ibex ferociously attacked me. That fat bastard! The ibex mangled my pinky finger. God damn it! Now i have no pinky finger to pick my nose with. Great horny toads! Whats a fat man going to eat without his snot-picker? Maybe some Salo? Or some mustard? Holy fucking chicken! Roasting a pigeon is the best! Need a beer so i can pick my wedding dress, burlap,fiberglass,chainmail? I'm so hot! I love my gay lover "Bob" slobbing my knob. I walk to the liquor store to buy Absinthe and skunky beer. I need money for more cocaine and crack whores with no teeth.YAY gum jobs! The skankier the bitches the better! Stop by misterpats to buy cocaine and found out he's no woman. In fact he's a well equipped guy who likes wearing womens clothing under his normal bra and panties. Wow! Who knew? CULES WERE EVERYWHERE!!! Even Columbo couldn't top MrPats outfit. what a sight! POOR MIXED-UP GUY!

The next day, at work I discovered that a furry pussy cat scratched my face. It got infected and puss was oozing from my face and asshole. With gangrene imminent, I quickly call Frankie, "Come suck disgusting infectious wounds!" Licking his lips, after daisy chaining a few men, clamped down and wouldn't let go of my left earlobe so now i hear hot breath whispering "Ich dien!" wow what the fuck, your GAY!!! and smell like stale fumunda cheese. Whew I stink! I need delousing! And some douching!!! I clean my left arm pit, to no avail, it still smells. Time for lunch. Peanut butter & bologna,Myseost and Natto don't hold a candle to Surströmming! Later on, I expiscate anomalous verdigris and pass gas. Ugh! Thats me??? I'm worse than moldy rotten tofu! I need a disinfectant chemical bath.

I need to

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9 years 9 months ago #557 by riada
Replied by riada on topic Three Word Story
Today, I went to fuckin work and farted profusely on my coworkers and it smelled like dead gerbils. So the coworkers decided to beat me senseless till I lost control of my bowels. I got up and felt a sharp pain in My groin area. So i screamed, "HOLY FUCKING SHIT!, call the doctor!" The doctor said, "ice your balls". I said, "why?" he said, "because, balls are swollen." I wonder how I got kicked and it hurts.

I'm driving home, balls hanging down to My knees. I pick them up, they have warts. So I'm home taking it easy, drinkin' a beer when suddenly I have no smokes and consider castration.

The next day i lick myself and find LTG kicking my ass and then licking the TV screen. I quickly dressed and headed to the closet brothel to find me a hot hooker with hairy armpits who looked like Joey Lauren Adams. After this, I went to Pathmark to buy protection from this skanky dirty meat hole. But instead I sat on my sweaty swollen balls and played with those little things. I got hungry and ate some wet dog food from the garbage from last week. It was delicious! Then I noticed my nose bleeding from to much Powdered Phororhacos Bill. I grab my big 10 inch black rubber dildo and head to The Town Square where i proceed to touch myself. Meanwhile, the 10" black rubber dildo is still lost and I'm worried it will never be recovered from the thief who stole my toy. I'm so mad! Hopefully someone will choke my chicken or perhaps will demonic do it? You never know. He's that type, that damn homo.

I look outside and its raining so i dance. Then the police stopped by to test out there new and improved cavity search program. Now my sphincter has been widened beyond repair. Now it is prolapsed. I call my pimp and say,"tighten it up!" she giggled with much enthusiasm about seeing me naked and freshly violated, causing sexual tension between us two. It was hard and i couldn't hold my bowels for much longer! My pimp stuck a cork in it, and said,"in your ass is a surprise!" Later that night, after all the canned beans were opened and eaten, I watched TV. Those Ghost Adventurers sure do SUCK! My sphincter clenching, in pain from having butt sex way to much. Should use lubricant instead of glue made for shoes! Now my pubes are glued together and it ITCHES!

The next day I woke up and forgot to remove my underwear from my sticky, smelly private parts. It was hard to peel them off my balls,but i managed to wax myself totally Brazilian style. I then discovered my left nut was mysteriously missing. Now I'm Pissed that I have only one nut. But, life goes on and I'm having an orgasm. It seems like I function fine, cause it splattered purple goo from my third eye.

So for breakfast i went to my local Hooters. The waitress suggested I cover my hairy chest with her hairy chest. What a sight! So I did. Boy did we create a scene! The local newspaper reported that we started a new spicy breakfast sandwich. It was sooo spicy even Demonic rated it X.

After breakfast I went to Walmart to buy worms. I plan on getting real kinky while fishing today. I stop home and grab my new 10" dildo, which is smaller than the fish, but it comes with a violent temper. I prep myself for anything that could possibly go wrong with the violent implement. I'm nervous that I might enjoy it less than I planned on. I drive to Rockland Psychiatric Hospital and the orderlies were chasing around a three legged dog in the cafeteria. I freak and call Misterpat while masturbating to Master Of Puppets. He said not to give chase and I'm babbling. He hangs up. Miffed I pick up an icepick and stab the worms i bought till they died. Finding that erotic, I head to the lake nearby stripping clothes as I drive slowly while singing Russian speed metal softly. Start the boat on the trailer and then it overheated really bad. Smoke billowing from everywhere! I grab my glass bong and my lighter to fix the motor McGyver style, so I got my tongue stuck in the carburetor and screamed like a little girl. Screw fishing today,I'm going bowling.

The balls are very heavy to lift without tongue properly in place. I'm going exploring with my tongue. The pin setter simply looks erotic,so i decided to deep throat a bowling pin. Then I shoved it in my lunch box so AlmostGone wouldn't be to jealous of my oral skills and ask me to drop the videos of him lost in the Pink Pussycat Theater with naked midgets, dancing around him. Then i walked to the bar,drank from boot and smelled the disgusting foot cheese I didn't clean. Then I vomited my breakfast sandwich out the window onto LithiumBaby's round,but firm mammaries. She then vomited green play dough out her nose. She bitch slapped me until comatose. Then she kicked me in the balls until i cried like an unpaid tranny prostitute. She's one bad-ass! In the meantime,Hidinginshadows is laughing at Chuck Norris while he is sucking Demonic's dick. Boy, can Chuck swallow a lot, Then he decided to reach around and grab a set of nunchucks. Lubricating them up, and inserted into my prolapsed scphinter, and it hurt! Sperm was dripping from my nose. Whatta bad day!

Time for lunch,moldy kimchee again ,which reminded me of something from that movie "Airplane". I bite into it and feel something really squishy. I look down at my lunch and see a piece of jellyfish! Seems Riada switched my lunch with some seafood special! Why would she do that to my dog food. Not sure how,or even why, she would do the old switch. Strange,but tasty, I eat the entire foot long and then grab a frosty mug of flat soda. Boy was that hitting the spot!

Now I head to the pet store and buy 2 cute gerbils, to stick them in Uno's nostrils. I think he will need some pliers to help remove them from his sore snot passages. "Puffs" wont help,damn lazy hyena! Drive to the overpriced home cheapo, and get a box of screws so i can build a cage to put the case of beer so the gerbils feel at home. Those damn drunks! Why do they stink like shit ? Once the cage is finished i took a shit. Boy I'm Smelly! Into the shower, to clean my crab infested crotch. ""Ichatta!" I scream. Hot water on my inimical nereid! I jump out of the shower, dry myself off, and my toe cheese is still flaming hot red, grab the tinactin,and inhale the viridescent Cutaneus mastocytosis. That was when I realized I had bad herpes.

On my way to the hospital, I was followed by a purple one eyed monster who's name is Crazy Blonde chick. Boy she's UGLY! The doctor said," Stop jerking off. If you don't, You will loose sensation in your dapplegray pneumatic sackbut." Terrorized of the thought of losing my livelyhood I reach into my cache of erotic rubberbands and sprinklers to only find cobwebs and moths. Rattlehead stole everything !

Off to the "toy" store with my cache to find a new tomato red flesh light. A bellicose griffin jumped in front of my car and guts splattered all over my piece of shit Yugo Hatchback speedster! A malordorous overlay to my shitty day i am having so far. I think its time to go home and sleep an hope for a nice quite night at home. Unfortunately I cant sleep without my cuddly baby blanket. Pictures of Manehawk being arrested are soothing to me, as is regicide of the hotdog. I think of him showering with me one day as I breathe slowly smoking my marlboros. He's so hot! Sal volatile, quick!

Time for bed need to rest The next day, a truculent ibex ferociously attacked me. That fat bastard! The ibex mangled my pinky finger. God damn it! Now i have no pinky finger to pick my nose with. Great horny toads! Whats a fat man going to eat without his snot-picker? Maybe some Salo? Or some mustard? Holy fucking chicken! Roasting a pigeon is the best! Need a beer so i can pick my wedding dress, burlap,fiberglass,chainmail? I'm so hot! I love my gay lover "Bob" slobbing my knob. I walk to the liquor store to buy Absinthe and skunky beer. I need money for more cocaine and crack whores with no teeth.YAY gum jobs! The skankier the bitches the better! Stop by misterpats to buy cocaine and found out he's no woman. In fact he's a well equipped guy who likes wearing womens clothing under his normal bra and panties. Wow! Who knew? CULES WERE EVERYWHERE!!! Even Columbo couldn't top MrPats outfit. what a sight! POOR MIXED-UP GUY!

The next day, at work I discovered that a furry pussy cat scratched my face. It got infected and puss was oozing from my face and asshole. With gangrene imminent, I quickly call Frankie, "Come suck disgusting infectious wounds!" Licking his lips, after daisy chaining a few men, clamped down and wouldn't let go of my left earlobe so now i hear hot breath whispering "Ich dien!" wow what the fuck, your GAY!!! and smell like stale fumunda cheese. Whew I stink! I need delousing! And some douching!!! I clean my left arm pit, to no avail, it still smells. Time for lunch. Peanut butter & bologna,Myseost and Natto don't hold a candle to Surströmming! Later on, I expiscate anomalous verdigris and pass gas. Ugh! Thats me??? I'm worse than moldy rotten tofu! I need a disinfectant chemical bath.

I need to cachinnate at scripophiles

Nor but in sleep findeth a cure for care.
Incertainty that once gave scope to dream
Of laughing enterprise and glory untold,
Is now a blackness that no stars redeem.

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More
9 years 9 months ago #558 by almostgone
Replied by almostgone on topic Three Word Story
Today, I went to fuckin work and farted profusely on my coworkers and it smelled like dead gerbils. So the coworkers decided to beat me senseless till I lost control of my bowels. I got up and felt a sharp pain in My groin area. So i screamed, "HOLY FUCKING SHIT!, call the doctor!" The doctor said, "ice your balls". I said, "why?" he said, "because, balls are swollen." I wonder how I got kicked and it hurts.

I'm driving home, balls hanging down to My knees. I pick them up, they have warts. So I'm home taking it easy, drinkin' a beer when suddenly I have no smokes and consider castration.

The next day i lick myself and find LTG kicking my ass and then licking the TV screen. I quickly dressed and headed to the closet brothel to find me a hot hooker with hairy armpits who looked like Joey Lauren Adams. After this, I went to Pathmark to buy protection from this skanky dirty meat hole. But instead I sat on my sweaty swollen balls and played with those little things. I got hungry and ate some wet dog food from the garbage from last week. It was delicious! Then I noticed my nose bleeding from to much Powdered Phororhacos Bill. I grab my big 10 inch black rubber dildo and head to The Town Square where i proceed to touch myself. Meanwhile, the 10" black rubber dildo is still lost and I'm worried it will never be recovered from the thief who stole my toy. I'm so mad! Hopefully someone will choke my chicken or perhaps will demonic do it? You never know. He's that type, that damn homo.

I look outside and its raining so i dance. Then the police stopped by to test out there new and improved cavity search program. Now my sphincter has been widened beyond repair. Now it is prolapsed. I call my pimp and say,"tighten it up!" she giggled with much enthusiasm about seeing me naked and freshly violated, causing sexual tension between us two. It was hard and i couldn't hold my bowels for much longer! My pimp stuck a cork in it, and said,"in your ass is a surprise!" Later that night, after all the canned beans were opened and eaten, I watched TV. Those Ghost Adventurers sure do SUCK! My sphincter clenching, in pain from having butt sex way to much. Should use lubricant instead of glue made for shoes! Now my pubes are glued together and it ITCHES!

The next day I woke up and forgot to remove my underwear from my sticky, smelly private parts. It was hard to peel them off my balls,but i managed to wax myself totally Brazilian style. I then discovered my left nut was mysteriously missing. Now I'm Pissed that I have only one nut. But, life goes on and I'm having an orgasm. It seems like I function fine, cause it splattered purple goo from my third eye.

So for breakfast i went to my local Hooters. The waitress suggested I cover my hairy chest with her hairy chest. What a sight! So I did. Boy did we create a scene! The local newspaper reported that we started a new spicy breakfast sandwich. It was sooo spicy even Demonic rated it X.

After breakfast I went to Walmart to buy worms. I plan on getting real kinky while fishing today. I stop home and grab my new 10" dildo, which is smaller than the fish, but it comes with a violent temper. I prep myself for anything that could possibly go wrong with the violent implement. I'm nervous that I might enjoy it less than I planned on. I drive to Rockland Psychiatric Hospital and the orderlies were chasing around a three legged dog in the cafeteria. I freak and call Misterpat while masturbating to Master Of Puppets. He said not to give chase and I'm babbling. He hangs up. Miffed I pick up an icepick and stab the worms i bought till they died. Finding that erotic, I head to the lake nearby stripping clothes as I drive slowly while singing Russian speed metal softly. Start the boat on the trailer and then it overheated really bad. Smoke billowing from everywhere! I grab my glass bong and my lighter to fix the motor McGyver style, so I got my tongue stuck in the carburetor and screamed like a little girl. Screw fishing today,I'm going bowling.

The balls are very heavy to lift without tongue properly in place. I'm going exploring with my tongue. The pin setter simply looks erotic,so i decided to deep throat a bowling pin. Then I shoved it in my lunch box so AlmostGone wouldn't be to jealous of my oral skills and ask me to drop the videos of him lost in the Pink Pussycat Theater with naked midgets, dancing around him. Then i walked to the bar,drank from boot and smelled the disgusting foot cheese I didn't clean. Then I vomited my breakfast sandwich out the window onto LithiumBaby's round,but firm mammaries. She then vomited green play dough out her nose. She bitch slapped me until comatose. Then she kicked me in the balls until i cried like an unpaid tranny prostitute. She's one bad-ass! In the meantime,Hidinginshadows is laughing at Chuck Norris while he is sucking Demonic's dick. Boy, can Chuck swallow a lot, Then he decided to reach around and grab a set of nunchucks. Lubricating them up, and inserted into my prolapsed scphinter, and it hurt! Sperm was dripping from my nose. Whatta bad day!

Time for lunch,moldy kimchee again ,which reminded me of something from that movie "Airplane". I bite into it and feel something really squishy. I look down at my lunch and see a piece of jellyfish! Seems Riada switched my lunch with some seafood special! Why would she do that to my dog food. Not sure how,or even why, she would do the old switch. Strange,but tasty, I eat the entire foot long and then grab a frosty mug of flat soda. Boy was that hitting the spot!

Now I head to the pet store and buy 2 cute gerbils, to stick them in Uno's nostrils. I think he will need some pliers to help remove them from his sore snot passages. "Puffs" wont help,damn lazy hyena! Drive to the overpriced home cheapo, and get a box of screws so i can build a cage to put the case of beer so the gerbils feel at home. Those damn drunks! Why do they stink like shit ? Once the cage is finished i took a shit. Boy I'm Smelly! Into the shower, to clean my crab infested crotch. ""Ichatta!" I scream. Hot water on my inimical nereid! I jump out of the shower, dry myself off, and my toe cheese is still flaming hot red, grab the tinactin,and inhale the viridescent Cutaneus mastocytosis. That was when I realized I had bad herpes.

On my way to the hospital, I was followed by a purple one eyed monster who's name is Crazy Blonde chick. Boy she's UGLY! The doctor said," Stop jerking off. If you don't, You will loose sensation in your dapplegray pneumatic sackbut." Terrorized of the thought of losing my livelyhood I reach into my cache of erotic rubberbands and sprinklers to only find cobwebs and moths. Rattlehead stole everything !

Off to the "toy" store with my cache to find a new tomato red flesh light. A bellicose griffin jumped in front of my car and guts splattered all over my piece of shit Yugo Hatchback speedster! A malordorous overlay to my shitty day i am having so far. I think its time to go home and sleep an hope for a nice quite night at home. Unfortunately I cant sleep without my cuddly baby blanket. Pictures of Manehawk being arrested are soothing to me, as is regicide of the hotdog. I think of him showering with me one day as I breathe slowly smoking my marlboros. He's so hot! Sal volatile, quick!

Time for bed need to rest The next day, a truculent ibex ferociously attacked me. That fat bastard! The ibex mangled my pinky finger. God damn it! Now i have no pinky finger to pick my nose with. Great horny toads! Whats a fat man going to eat without his snot-picker? Maybe some Salo? Or some mustard? Holy fucking chicken! Roasting a pigeon is the best! Need a beer so i can pick my wedding dress, burlap,fiberglass,chainmail? I'm so hot! I love my gay lover "Bob" slobbing my knob. I walk to the liquor store to buy Absinthe and skunky beer. I need money for more cocaine and crack whores with no teeth.YAY gum jobs! The skankier the bitches the better! Stop by misterpats to buy cocaine and found out he's no woman. In fact he's a well equipped guy who likes wearing womens clothing under his normal bra and panties. Wow! Who knew? CULES WERE EVERYWHERE!!! Even Columbo couldn't top MrPats outfit. what a sight! POOR MIXED-UP GUY!

The next day, at work I discovered that a furry pussy cat scratched my face. It got infected and puss was oozing from my face and asshole. With gangrene imminent, I quickly call Frankie, "Come suck disgusting infectious wounds!" Licking his lips, after daisy chaining a few men, clamped down and wouldn't let go of my left earlobe so now i hear hot breath whispering "Ich dien!" wow what the fuck, your GAY!!! and smell like stale fumunda cheese. Whew I stink! I need delousing! And some douching!!! I clean my left arm pit, to no avail, it still smells. Time for lunch. Peanut butter & bologna,Myseost and Natto don't hold a candle to Surströmming! Later on, I expiscate anomalous verdigris and pass gas. Ugh! Thats me??? I'm worse than moldy rotten tofu! I need a disinfectant chemical bath.

I need to cachinnate at scripophiles and get the

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More
9 years 9 months ago #559 by riada
Replied by riada on topic Three Word Story
Today, I went to fuckin work and farted profusely on my coworkers and it smelled like dead gerbils. So the coworkers decided to beat me senseless till I lost control of my bowels. I got up and felt a sharp pain in My groin area. So i screamed, "HOLY FUCKING SHIT!, call the doctor!" The doctor said, "ice your balls". I said, "why?" he said, "because, balls are swollen." I wonder how I got kicked and it hurts.

I'm driving home, balls hanging down to My knees. I pick them up, they have warts. So I'm home taking it easy, drinkin' a beer when suddenly I have no smokes and consider castration.

The next day i lick myself and find LTG kicking my ass and then licking the TV screen. I quickly dressed and headed to the closet brothel to find me a hot hooker with hairy armpits who looked like Joey Lauren Adams. After this, I went to Pathmark to buy protection from this skanky dirty meat hole. But instead I sat on my sweaty swollen balls and played with those little things. I got hungry and ate some wet dog food from the garbage from last week. It was delicious! Then I noticed my nose bleeding from to much Powdered Phororhacos Bill. I grab my big 10 inch black rubber dildo and head to The Town Square where i proceed to touch myself. Meanwhile, the 10" black rubber dildo is still lost and I'm worried it will never be recovered from the thief who stole my toy. I'm so mad! Hopefully someone will choke my chicken or perhaps will demonic do it? You never know. He's that type, that damn homo.

I look outside and its raining so i dance. Then the police stopped by to test out there new and improved cavity search program. Now my sphincter has been widened beyond repair. Now it is prolapsed. I call my pimp and say,"tighten it up!" she giggled with much enthusiasm about seeing me naked and freshly violated, causing sexual tension between us two. It was hard and i couldn't hold my bowels for much longer! My pimp stuck a cork in it, and said,"in your ass is a surprise!" Later that night, after all the canned beans were opened and eaten, I watched TV. Those Ghost Adventurers sure do SUCK! My sphincter clenching, in pain from having butt sex way to much. Should use lubricant instead of glue made for shoes! Now my pubes are glued together and it ITCHES!

The next day I woke up and forgot to remove my underwear from my sticky, smelly private parts. It was hard to peel them off my balls,but i managed to wax myself totally Brazilian style. I then discovered my left nut was mysteriously missing. Now I'm Pissed that I have only one nut. But, life goes on and I'm having an orgasm. It seems like I function fine, cause it splattered purple goo from my third eye.

So for breakfast i went to my local Hooters. The waitress suggested I cover my hairy chest with her hairy chest. What a sight! So I did. Boy did we create a scene! The local newspaper reported that we started a new spicy breakfast sandwich. It was sooo spicy even Demonic rated it X.

After breakfast I went to Walmart to buy worms. I plan on getting real kinky while fishing today. I stop home and grab my new 10" dildo, which is smaller than the fish, but it comes with a violent temper. I prep myself for anything that could possibly go wrong with the violent implement. I'm nervous that I might enjoy it less than I planned on. I drive to Rockland Psychiatric Hospital and the orderlies were chasing around a three legged dog in the cafeteria. I freak and call Misterpat while masturbating to Master Of Puppets. He said not to give chase and I'm babbling. He hangs up. Miffed I pick up an icepick and stab the worms i bought till they died. Finding that erotic, I head to the lake nearby stripping clothes as I drive slowly while singing Russian speed metal softly. Start the boat on the trailer and then it overheated really bad. Smoke billowing from everywhere! I grab my glass bong and my lighter to fix the motor McGyver style, so I got my tongue stuck in the carburetor and screamed like a little girl. Screw fishing today,I'm going bowling.

The balls are very heavy to lift without tongue properly in place. I'm going exploring with my tongue. The pin setter simply looks erotic,so i decided to deep throat a bowling pin. Then I shoved it in my lunch box so AlmostGone wouldn't be to jealous of my oral skills and ask me to drop the videos of him lost in the Pink Pussycat Theater with naked midgets, dancing around him. Then i walked to the bar,drank from boot and smelled the disgusting foot cheese I didn't clean. Then I vomited my breakfast sandwich out the window onto LithiumBaby's round,but firm mammaries. She then vomited green play dough out her nose. She bitch slapped me until comatose. Then she kicked me in the balls until i cried like an unpaid tranny prostitute. She's one bad-ass! In the meantime,Hidinginshadows is laughing at Chuck Norris while he is sucking Demonic's dick. Boy, can Chuck swallow a lot, Then he decided to reach around and grab a set of nunchucks. Lubricating them up, and inserted into my prolapsed scphinter, and it hurt! Sperm was dripping from my nose. Whatta bad day!

Time for lunch,moldy kimchee again ,which reminded me of something from that movie "Airplane". I bite into it and feel something really squishy. I look down at my lunch and see a piece of jellyfish! Seems Riada switched my lunch with some seafood special! Why would she do that to my dog food. Not sure how,or even why, she would do the old switch. Strange,but tasty, I eat the entire foot long and then grab a frosty mug of flat soda. Boy was that hitting the spot!

Now I head to the pet store and buy 2 cute gerbils, to stick them in Uno's nostrils. I think he will need some pliers to help remove them from his sore snot passages. "Puffs" wont help,damn lazy hyena! Drive to the overpriced home cheapo, and get a box of screws so i can build a cage to put the case of beer so the gerbils feel at home. Those damn drunks! Why do they stink like shit ? Once the cage is finished i took a shit. Boy I'm Smelly! Into the shower, to clean my crab infested crotch. ""Ichatta!" I scream. Hot water on my inimical nereid! I jump out of the shower, dry myself off, and my toe cheese is still flaming hot red, grab the tinactin,and inhale the viridescent Cutaneus mastocytosis. That was when I realized I had bad herpes.

On my way to the hospital, I was followed by a purple one eyed monster who's name is Crazy Blonde chick. Boy she's UGLY! The doctor said," Stop jerking off. If you don't, You will loose sensation in your dapplegray pneumatic sackbut." Terrorized of the thought of losing my livelyhood I reach into my cache of erotic rubberbands and sprinklers to only find cobwebs and moths. Rattlehead stole everything !

Off to the "toy" store with my cache to find a new tomato red flesh light. A bellicose griffin jumped in front of my car and guts splattered all over my piece of shit Yugo Hatchback speedster! A malordorous overlay to my shitty day i am having so far. I think its time to go home and sleep an hope for a nice quite night at home. Unfortunately I cant sleep without my cuddly baby blanket. Pictures of Manehawk being arrested are soothing to me, as is regicide of the hotdog. I think of him showering with me one day as I breathe slowly smoking my marlboros. He's so hot! Sal volatile, quick!

Time for bed need to rest The next day, a truculent ibex ferociously attacked me. That fat bastard! The ibex mangled my pinky finger. God damn it! Now i have no pinky finger to pick my nose with. Great horny toads! Whats a fat man going to eat without his snot-picker? Maybe some Salo? Or some mustard? Holy fucking chicken! Roasting a pigeon is the best! Need a beer so i can pick my wedding dress, burlap,fiberglass,chainmail? I'm so hot! I love my gay lover "Bob" slobbing my knob. I walk to the liquor store to buy Absinthe and skunky beer. I need money for more cocaine and crack whores with no teeth.YAY gum jobs! The skankier the bitches the better! Stop by misterpats to buy cocaine and found out he's no woman. In fact he's a well equipped guy who likes wearing womens clothing under his normal bra and panties. Wow! Who knew? CULES WERE EVERYWHERE!!! Even Columbo couldn't top MrPats outfit. what a sight! POOR MIXED-UP GUY!

The next day, at work I discovered that a furry pussy cat scratched my face. It got infected and puss was oozing from my face and asshole. With gangrene imminent, I quickly call Frankie, "Come suck disgusting infectious wounds!" Licking his lips, after daisy chaining a few men, clamped down and wouldn't let go of my left earlobe so now i hear hot breath whispering "Ich dien!" wow what the fuck, your GAY!!! and smell like stale fumunda cheese. Whew I stink! I need delousing! And some douching!!! I clean my left arm pit, to no avail, it still smells. Time for lunch. Peanut butter & bologna,Myseost and Natto don't hold a candle to Surströmming! Later on, I expiscate anomalous verdigris and pass gas. Ugh! Thats me??? I'm worse than moldy rotten tofu! I need a disinfectant chemical bath.

I need to cachinnate at scripophiles and get the shako wearing serow

Nor but in sleep findeth a cure for care.
Incertainty that once gave scope to dream
Of laughing enterprise and glory untold,
Is now a blackness that no stars redeem.

Please Log in or Create an account to join the conversation.

More
9 years 7 months ago #560 by almostgone
Replied by almostgone on topic Three Word Story
Today, I went to fuckin work and farted profusely on my coworkers and it smelled like dead gerbils. So the coworkers decided to beat me senseless till I lost control of my bowels. I got up and felt a sharp pain in My groin area. So i screamed, "HOLY FUCKING SHIT!, call the doctor!" The doctor said, "ice your balls". I said, "why?" he said, "because, balls are swollen." I wonder how I got kicked and it hurts.

I'm driving home, balls hanging down to My knees. I pick them up, they have warts. So I'm home taking it easy, drinkin' a beer when suddenly I have no smokes and consider castration.

The next day i lick myself and find LTG kicking my ass and then licking the TV screen. I quickly dressed and headed to the closet brothel to find me a hot hooker with hairy armpits who looked like Joey Lauren Adams. After this, I went to Pathmark to buy protection from this skanky dirty meat hole. But instead I sat on my sweaty swollen balls and played with those little things. I got hungry and ate some wet dog food from the garbage from last week. It was delicious! Then I noticed my nose bleeding from to much Powdered Phororhacos Bill. I grab my big 10 inch black rubber dildo and head to The Town Square where i proceed to touch myself. Meanwhile, the 10" black rubber dildo is still lost and I'm worried it will never be recovered from the thief who stole my toy. I'm so mad! Hopefully someone will choke my chicken or perhaps will demonic do it? You never know. He's that type, that damn homo.

I look outside and its raining so i dance. Then the police stopped by to test out there new and improved cavity search program. Now my sphincter has been widened beyond repair. Now it is prolapsed. I call my pimp and say,"tighten it up!" she giggled with much enthusiasm about seeing me naked and freshly violated, causing sexual tension between us two. It was hard and i couldn't hold my bowels for much longer! My pimp stuck a cork in it, and said,"in your ass is a surprise!" Later that night, after all the canned beans were opened and eaten, I watched TV. Those Ghost Adventurers sure do SUCK! My sphincter clenching, in pain from having butt sex way to much. Should use lubricant instead of glue made for shoes! Now my pubes are glued together and it ITCHES!

The next day I woke up and forgot to remove my underwear from my sticky, smelly private parts. It was hard to peel them off my balls,but i managed to wax myself totally Brazilian style. I then discovered my left nut was mysteriously missing. Now I'm Pissed that I have only one nut. But, life goes on and I'm having an orgasm. It seems like I function fine, cause it splattered purple goo from my third eye.

So for breakfast i went to my local Hooters. The waitress suggested I cover my hairy chest with her hairy chest. What a sight! So I did. Boy did we create a scene! The local newspaper reported that we started a new spicy breakfast sandwich. It was sooo spicy even Demonic rated it X.

After breakfast I went to Walmart to buy worms. I plan on getting real kinky while fishing today. I stop home and grab my new 10" dildo, which is smaller than the fish, but it comes with a violent temper. I prep myself for anything that could possibly go wrong with the violent implement. I'm nervous that I might enjoy it less than I planned on. I drive to Rockland Psychiatric Hospital and the orderlies were chasing around a three legged dog in the cafeteria. I freak and call Misterpat while masturbating to Master Of Puppets. He said not to give chase and I'm babbling. He hangs up. Miffed I pick up an icepick and stab the worms i bought till they died. Finding that erotic, I head to the lake nearby stripping clothes as I drive slowly while singing Russian speed metal softly. Start the boat on the trailer and then it overheated really bad. Smoke billowing from everywhere! I grab my glass bong and my lighter to fix the motor McGyver style, so I got my tongue stuck in the carburetor and screamed like a little girl. Screw fishing today,I'm going bowling.

The balls are very heavy to lift without tongue properly in place. I'm going exploring with my tongue. The pin setter simply looks erotic,so i decided to deep throat a bowling pin. Then I shoved it in my lunch box so AlmostGone wouldn't be to jealous of my oral skills and ask me to drop the videos of him lost in the Pink Pussycat Theater with naked midgets, dancing around him. Then i walked to the bar,drank from boot and smelled the disgusting foot cheese I didn't clean. Then I vomited my breakfast sandwich out the window onto LithiumBaby's round,but firm mammaries. She then vomited green play dough out her nose. She bitch slapped me until comatose. Then she kicked me in the balls until i cried like an unpaid tranny prostitute. She's one bad-ass! In the meantime,Hidinginshadows is laughing at Chuck Norris while he is sucking Demonic's dick. Boy, can Chuck swallow a lot, Then he decided to reach around and grab a set of nunchucks. Lubricating them up, and inserted into my prolapsed scphinter, and it hurt! Sperm was dripping from my nose. Whatta bad day!

Time for lunch,moldy kimchee again ,which reminded me of something from that movie "Airplane". I bite into it and feel something really squishy. I look down at my lunch and see a piece of jellyfish! Seems Riada switched my lunch with some seafood special! Why would she do that to my dog food. Not sure how,or even why, she would do the old switch. Strange,but tasty, I eat the entire foot long and then grab a frosty mug of flat soda. Boy was that hitting the spot!

Now I head to the pet store and buy 2 cute gerbils, to stick them in Uno's nostrils. I think he will need some pliers to help remove them from his sore snot passages. "Puffs" wont help,damn lazy hyena! Drive to the overpriced home cheapo, and get a box of screws so i can build a cage to put the case of beer so the gerbils feel at home. Those damn drunks! Why do they stink like shit ? Once the cage is finished i took a shit. Boy I'm Smelly! Into the shower, to clean my crab infested crotch. ""Ichatta!" I scream. Hot water on my inimical nereid! I jump out of the shower, dry myself off, and my toe cheese is still flaming hot red, grab the tinactin,and inhale the viridescent Cutaneus mastocytosis. That was when I realized I had bad herpes.

On my way to the hospital, I was followed by a purple one eyed monster who's name is Crazy Blonde chick. Boy she's UGLY! The doctor said," Stop jerking off. If you don't, You will loose sensation in your dapplegray pneumatic sackbut." Terrorized of the thought of losing my livelyhood I reach into my cache of erotic rubberbands and sprinklers to only find cobwebs and moths. Rattlehead stole everything !

Off to the "toy" store with my cache to find a new tomato red flesh light. A bellicose griffin jumped in front of my car and guts splattered all over my piece of shit Yugo Hatchback speedster! A malordorous overlay to my shitty day i am having so far. I think its time to go home and sleep an hope for a nice quite night at home. Unfortunately I cant sleep without my cuddly baby blanket. Pictures of Manehawk being arrested are soothing to me, as is regicide of the hotdog. I think of him showering with me one day as I breathe slowly smoking my marlboros. He's so hot! Sal volatile, quick!

Time for bed need to rest The next day, a truculent ibex ferociously attacked me. That fat bastard! The ibex mangled my pinky finger. God damn it! Now i have no pinky finger to pick my nose with. Great horny toads! Whats a fat man going to eat without his snot-picker? Maybe some Salo? Or some mustard? Holy fucking chicken! Roasting a pigeon is the best! Need a beer so i can pick my wedding dress, burlap,fiberglass,chainmail? I'm so hot! I love my gay lover "Bob" slobbing my knob. I walk to the liquor store to buy Absinthe and skunky beer. I need money for more cocaine and crack whores with no teeth.YAY gum jobs! The skankier the bitches the better! Stop by misterpats to buy cocaine and found out he's no woman. In fact he's a well equipped guy who likes wearing womens clothing under his normal bra and panties. Wow! Who knew? CULES WERE EVERYWHERE!!! Even Columbo couldn't top MrPats outfit. what a sight! POOR MIXED-UP GUY!

The next day, at work I discovered that a furry pussy cat scratched my face. It got infected and puss was oozing from my face and asshole. With gangrene imminent, I quickly call Frankie, "Come suck disgusting infectious wounds!" Licking his lips, after daisy chaining a few men, clamped down and wouldn't let go of my left earlobe so now i hear hot breath whispering "Ich dien!" wow what the fuck, your GAY!!! and smell like stale fumunda cheese. Whew I stink! I need delousing! And some douching!!! I clean my left arm pit, to no avail, it still smells. Time for lunch. Peanut butter & bologna,Myseost and Natto don't hold a candle to Surströmming! Later on, I expiscate anomalous verdigris and pass gas. Ugh! Thats me??? I'm worse than moldy rotten tofu! I need a disinfectant chemical bath.

I need to cachinnate at scripophiles and get the shako wearing serow. Off to the

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